Moore News

Friends

2012-02-11T18:41:00.000-08:00

"The next best thing to being wise oneself
is to live in a circle of those who are."

~ C.S. Lewis ~

This morning, a group of inspiring women met together for breakfast at 6:30! It is so amazing how God has brought this small group of women together, because each woman adds something to the table that only she can bring. Something that perfectly complements the offerings of the others. The overall effect is a group that leaves you feeling encouraged, inspired, and with a firm resolve to continue in the race. A divine appointment, for sure!

After resting a bit with the princess, we went for our daily outing...to the grocery store! Tofu was on sale, so we went to the local health food market (I know, I know...things are bad when you get excited about a tofu sale...but c'mon...it was 5/$1!) to stock up (it freezes very well).

At this point, it was almost 1pm, and I was feeling very hungry. To avoid another hypoglycemic episode like yesterday (!!), I quickly made some fajitas with red and green bell peppers (also on sale today), baby bellos, and chicken-style seitan. This was my first time cooking seitan like that, and I thought the end result was pretty good. I made two corn tortilla tacos, and that was plenty.

Then I finished making a chocolate cake that has three layers. I baked the bottom layer last night. The pretty picture is on the source website, so feel free to check it out! I never seem to have all the necessary ingredients on hand, so I sub here and there, affecting the overall result. :) Despite mine not looking as pretty, I had to sneak in a taste for a mid-afternoon snack!! It was scrumdiddlyumptious!

Now, I feel obligated to point out that one thing I've learned about my favorite dessert website is that portions are often deceiving. The pictures always make things look huge, when in fact they are very small (try to compare the size of things you know in the picture to the overall dessert. For example, in the website photo of this pie, see how the strawberry takes up most of the pie? That gives you an idea of how small it really is). To really show that, since the above picture makes it look like a huge piece of pie, I took a picture with a fork on the plate next to it. See how small this slice is? So, when I say I eat desserts everyday, and you see my pictures and wonder how on earth I could possibly still be losing weight, part of the reason is because my portions for dessert are very, very small.

See? That really is how wide the piece was, although I probably took two bites similar to the one on the fork before I took the picture. But you can see how small the whole piece really was!

Ok...enough about "trick" photography =D

After researching and finding a cashew queso recipe, I decided to make some today. Even the omnis in the house ended up loving it. Instead of using a raw red bell pepper when sauteeing the veggies, I used a fire-roasted one from a jar. I like my queso very spicy, and I knew that one jalapeno in the recipe would never cut it. One of my favorite pre-vegan splurges was the queso compuesto at Chuy's (chain Tex-mex restaurant that started in Austin). Their version includes ground beef, guacamole, and pico de gallo (if I remember correctly), and the whole family loved it. So, tonight I made my own vegan version. I used about a 1-inch section of my vegan chipotle sausage, which I diced and then cooked until almost crispy in some olive oil. With some fresh avocado and tomatoes, the overall effect was very much like the compuesto I used to enjoy!

We were pleasantly surprised today before dinner when homemade soup (caldo-style) was delivered to our house, sent from one of our part-time employees. What a blessing it was! H loved it, and although she clearly isn't feeling completely up to par today, she ate a bunch of it...rice, chicken, veggies, and all. R couldn't get over how it tasted almost exactly the way his grandmother used to make it. What a special delivery that was for our family today, since we are all struggling to get over allergies/colds/flu/whatever-it-is!

Which brings me back to the importance of friends. Wouldn't life be dull and unexciting without them? It is so easy to isolate ourselves, thinking we are protecting ourselves from hurt, disappointment, rejection, etc...when we were designed to fellowship with others! We were designed to encourage and be encouraged by others.

I am so thankful that God has answered my prayers for friends in our new city. He not only brought me a group of like-minded women, but he exceeded what I could have hoped for by bringing me a group of women that encourage and inspire me to be a better person!! So very thankful today :)
.

Yesterday's Food and Today's Bean Counting

2012-02-10T13:26:00.000-08:00

.
I started my morning yesterday with a vegan pumpkin spice latte, topped with homemade coconut cool whip. Yummy!

Then, for lunch I made a ceasar dressing that was one of my favorite salad dressings to date. It was so good! I drizzled it over a romaine heart salad with a small amount of finely chopped onion, some chopped fresh parsley, and homemade croutons (I love herby salads, though...if you don't like the taste of fresh herbs in your salad, then this one isn't for you!). For the croutons, I took Ezekiel bread and cubed it. I sprayed a baking sheet with non-stick cooking spray, put the cubes down, and then sprayed the tops of the cubes with cooking spray too. Then, I sprinkled onion powder, garlic powder, vegetable seasoning, dried basil and thyme. Baked in preheated oven at 450 for maybe 10 minutes? I just baked until they were a light golden brown and the desired level of crunch had been reached. I topped the salad with a small amount of the homemade parmesan substitute (also used in the caesar dressing), and this salad was amazing. Just what I needed after skipping raw veggies the day before! In fact, I thought it was SO good, I ate three bowls (yes, three) just like this one (!!) for lunch:

For dinner, I made quinoa, topped with sweet potato and chickpea stew. It was good. A little bland, but that might be because I tend to under-salt things and I can hardly taste anything because of my cold (or whatever it is).

For dessert? Wait, you didn't think I'd skip dessert, did you? Ha! Fat chance :) So, I made another dark chocolate mousse using sugar-free, homemade cocoa bliss, and topped with homemade coconut whipped cream, frozen hazelnut meal, and a frozen cherry. It was excellent! Now, this cocoa bliss thing is the same recipe used for the chocolate bars I mentioned in a recent post. Remember how mine ended up spongy? I thought it was because of the refined coconut oil or agave, but I tried it again using unrefined coconut oil and came out with the same result. So frustrating! I tried a third time (I wasn't eating all of this chocolate each time, just for the record). This time, I added the dark chocolate cocoa one tablespoon at a time, fully incorporating it before adding more. This did the trick! The result is beautiful...it works like magic shell. If you put it on something frozen, it hardens. If you melt it, it becomes runny like chocolate syrup. If you let it sit at room temperature, it is spreadable like chocolate butter. It is in a small jar on my countertop, and I am constantly tempted to just stick a small spoon in every time I walk by. It's that good.

Today, I became a bean counter. Literally. I made a chickpea "chicken" salad today, since the omnis in our house had chicken salad on their menu. I made mine using lowfat vegannaise and used Lowry's seasoned salt, but otherwise followed this recipe (which I halved). I ate my sandwich on two slices of Ezekiel bread, and added about 1/4 of a small avocado. After I ate my sandwich, I felt hungry. So, I took a spoon and proceeded to eat the rest of the batch! I couldn't help it. To plan the rest of my day correctly, I did something I haven't done in a long time. I counted calories, fat, carbs, etc...to see how much damage I had done. There is a very good reason I haven't counted these things in such a long time. Back when I was super-skinny, I was almost obsessed with what I ate (or mostly didn't eat), and so I just know I have a tendency to get too concerned with the numbers. Today, though, I wanted to count for a different reason. Not just to plan my dinner wisely, but to show you how eating the right foods can result in the right numbers, even when you eat until your heart's content. Now, do I normally eat four times the usual serving size? Not really. Today was an exception, but I guess I waited too long to eat something and my body was a little hypoglycemic? Regardless, here are the numbers, for anyone out there who cares:

Bread, avocado, vegannaise and all, total calories eaten for lunch today was 671.5. That is a lot for one meal, I'll give you that. But we should aim for at least 500 calories per meal when we are dieting to prevent the hypoglycemic response I had today. So, I'm not that far off. Would you believe that the southwest taco salad from Wendy's has 700 calories, 51 carbs, and 41 grams of fat? That's in a SALAD!

I had 25 grams of fat. If I plan a daily intake of 1800 calories (I have weight to lose, otherwise, I would try to stay at the recommended 2000-2200 calories/day), I should eat about 60g of fat per day. Each fat gram has 9 calories, and fat should make up approximately 20-30% of our total calorie intake (told you I used to be obsessed with this stuff! lol). So, I had roughly half of my expected fat grams in one sitting. Eh, not so bad considering I had none for breakfast and I only have one meal left. AND, let's not forget the types of fats I consumed: vegannaise, which has no animal fat and is based on plant fats like olive oil; garbanzo beans; and avocado (which we all know is considered a "healthy" fat). Not too shabby!

Carbs. The dreaded word. Everyone is so scared of carbs these days, myself included. However, women in my age group are supposed to have about 100-150 grams of carbs per day! Since I am trying to lose weight, I generally stay around or below 100 grams, even without counting them (I roughly estimated my last few days worth for purposes of that statement). Total carbs from today's binge-type lunch? 83. Guess how much fiber was in it? To find out the amount of carbohydrates my body actually consumed (it gets really scientific, but most people are familiar with the whole Weight Watcher's approach which makes it very simple), I subtract grams of fiber from total carbs. I ate TWENTY grams of fiber in my lunch today. That leaves me with a total carbohydrate intake of just 63 grams. 63! Just a little over half my daily target.

Let's talk a little about fiber. The recommended daily intake is about 25 grams of fiber for an 1800/day calorie diet. I ate almost that entire daily amount in one meal! The benefits to eating whole foods.

Ok...so the point of me sharing all of this? I pigged out today. Seriously. I know it, and now you know it. But, when you are eating whole foods and avoiding animal-based fats and products, the results really aren't that bad. I eat everyday without thinking I am on a diet. I eat when I want, what I want (within a range of acceptable foods), and however much I feel I need that day. And I still lose weight.

With so many women looking for their next diet plan or stressing about what they eat everyday, I thought my numbers were worth sharing. I made a decision this time to change my lifestyle, because I'm tired of feeling like I have to deprive myself of something to lose weight. Do I eat sugars, processed foods, meat or dairy products? No. However, the decision to avoid those foods has led me to a bigger realm of acceptable foods that I hardly noticed before, except in limited quantities (as side dishes, mostly). Foods that don't make me feel guilty. Foods that make me feel good. I was so tired of eating spinach in so many different ways and salads that I thought I would throw up the next time someone talked about eating spinach as a part of their weight loss plan. I was so tired of making my portions so tiny that I had raging headaches and insulin levels that bounced around, leaving me crabby and zapped of energy. I was so tired of having to count things. Of giving up things (like caesar salad dressing, or basically all salad dressings). Not that those things don't work for people...they just don't work for ME. I don't want to feel like I'm on a "diet," and then when I meet my weight goal just go back to the way things were (and feel guilty about it). I want to lose this weight and keep it off. For good. And I don't want any feelings of guilt or shame along the way, if I choose to indulge in homemade whipped cream. Or chocolate mousse. Both of which would sound really good right now, if I wasn't so full from all that chickpea salad! lol Maybe I'll just walk by that beautiful jar of sugar-free cocoa bliss on my countertop and dip my spoon in for a small taste :)
.

When You Can't Taste a Thing...

2012-02-08T13:30:00.000-08:00

.
I slept in this morning. Embarrassingly late. Despite the extra hours of sleep, I still woke up feeling horrible. Everything hurts.

Not one to let allergies, no matter how severe, keep me from moving about my day, I took a long, hot shower, blew my nose, got the little one dressed and headed off to the store! Although I mentioned a salad for today, I just couldn't get myself to stomach the thought of raw greens today. Since I can't really taste much, the texture of raw veggies just doesn't sound appealing. Soup, however, sounds wonderful. Mmm mmm good :)

Several recipes are on my radar today, but for a quick lunch I made a pot of this collard green and coconut milk soup. I am not a big coconut eater, and with R's severe food allergy, I haven't brought any into the house in over 6 years. However, after talking with R about it, he feels pretty confident that just touching a flake or drop of oil here and there isn't going to make him react adversely. He just can't ingest it. And he's happy to stay away from my weird vegan food, so he quickly obliged my request that he not ever taste anything I make unless he knows I haven't used coconut in any way, shape or form. The benefits of coconut oil in a vegan diet are many. It is a good thing to work in when you are eating so little fat like I am at this point. While I want to lose all of these extra pounds, I'm not eating this way to lose weight. I'm eating this way to feel good. And part of feeling good means eating enough fat to have healthy skin and hair, two of the biggest benefits to adding coconut oil into my diet. So...expect to see more and more recipes with aspects of coconut added in.

Long story to get to the soup, but found this on a blog I relate to - she is an attorney who decided to stay home with her daughters. I can relate! She has a quirky sense of humor that some find downright scary. Yup, been there too. :) She loves healthy food, but realizes that tasting good is a major part of enjoying said healthy food. Love it!

I made my version using lowfat coconut milk (not good for baking, I've learned, but fine when mixed into things like soup) and sweet potatoes (had some already at home and wasn't up for hunting down Kabocha squash). It was pretty good! I'm not a fan of collard greens, but this soup is one way to eat lots of them without really experiencing any more bitterness than a handful of kale. The coconut milk and nutmeg combination adds a rich flavor reminiscent of all the cream of ____ soups. Since my oldest son is trying to eat my way this week, he had some of the soup for lunch. He is kind of a picky eater, even though you'd never know that without living with him. lol He said it was good, but I saw that he left quite a bit of collard greens in his bowl when he put it into the sink. So, from a kid's perspective, probably not the best dish. From a mom seeking hearty, healthy food? Perfect, and very easy/quick to make.

For tonight, I am planning a vegan cream of tomato soup (that I will be making into a tomato basil soup) with a homemade topping that is supposed to be usable in place of parmesan cheese. We'll see how it goes! For the omnis in the house, we have a pork and vegetable stew cooking in the crockpot. To accompany both dishes, I've got the dough for olive oil bread currently rising.

Ok, after taking a break for "life," I'm back with pictures and feedback on tonight's planned dinner. First, the bread and soup recipes are awesome. I used 1 cup spelt flour in the bread, and it turned out great! I didn't really take the time to form the dough into a real loaf shape, so mine was rather flat and wide, but it still tasted fantastic, so no one cared what shape it was :) Second, putting hot liquids into the blender can be dangerous (I burned the top half of my finger when I blended it and it leaked out the top. Sigh. Guess I needed to RE-learn that lesson?). Why is that when you don't feel good, things just don't seem to work right? Maybe my fine motor skills are not as sharp as they usually are? Maybe my brain cells? I don't know! Despite the burn, I managed to safely finish blending the rest of my tomato soup, and I thought it was great!

Oh, and the "parmesan" topping? Crazy how well it works in place of parmesan! You can taste a little sesame, but paired with the nutritional yeast, the overall effect is a lot like parmesan: earthy depth with a slight bitterness. It was great!

What is the saying about colds and fevers? "Feed a cold, feed a fever?" What's that you say? One is supposed to starve? Not in my house :) I feed them both! And that's exactly what I did today. With hearty soups that seemed like comfort foods.

When we are feeling under the weather spiritually, where do we go for "comfort?" I thought about this today as I was trying to navigate through the grocery store, which was clearly filled with a bunch of unhappy people. Jerry and I kept laughing, because people were so blatantly rude. I think I need to pick a different time to go to the store :D Or....maybe that's exactly the time I should go, if I want a challenge. lol Anyway, I got to thinking about all the work I was going through today just to have some comfort food: soup; homemade bread. Do I seek these same things when I am spiritually "under the weather?" Or do I run quickly to Him? Do I seek comfort in His Word? Where do I run?

I hope I can honestly say that I run to Him, but there are days when it is more difficult than others. Today, for example, my head hurt, and trying to be "nice" when everything around me was in chaos was not easy. But it is not in my strength that I am to love those around me. It is in His. When I am at my weakest, He is at His strongest. Through my weakness, He becomes more evident. I want to realize my weakness every day, without having to be physically weak...I want Him to be evident to those around me through everything I do. I want to learn to rely on His strength every day, not just on more difficult days. Every day I need Him!

So...on this day when I can't taste a thing, I'm going to go back to the one food that can always satisfy: His Word.
.

Pre-Valentine's Day Fun

2012-02-07T19:11:00.000-08:00

.
Today was a very busy day. Add in the mold, tree and grass pollen counts which are "medium" (we want them to be "low," or "non-existent" for optimum comfort)...and ash pollen which is "high" (see above note), and today was a downright challenge.

I was up early to get ready for a photo shoot this morning in my home studio (aka my living room with the furniture moved out of the way!). It was such a joy to meet a fun, intelligent, beautiful woman and help her capture a professional head shot!

Before she got to the house, I blended my favorite pumpkin bread in a bowl and put it in the refrigerator to do its thing. When we were done with the shoot, H was awake, so she and I shared it for breakfast! So glad she will eat with me, or I'd end up eating way too much :)

A few hours later, I made apple pie pancakes for a fun brunch/lunch. I have a bowl full of apples I really need to use before they cross over from being very ripe to unusable. This recipe was perfect! I doubled the recipe, used spelt flour, stevia, and used the called for amount of soy creamer (I ran out of almond milk) and 1T evoo. After letting the batter sit while the cast iron skillet heated, it got really thick. I had to add more soy creamer to get it to thin out again. The end result was good, but I attribute that to the apple compote I made to top the cakes. I finely diced an entire apple (about a cup or a little more of apple), added two stevia packets, about a tsp of cinnamon and about 2T of water. Boiled the mixture until the apples were cooked and the mixture was thickened. The kids kept saying how good it was! Hehe...sugar-free pancakes made with spelt flour and soy creamer...score! Although I drizzed a little maple syrup on the kids', I used a little agave syrup for mine.

Doubling the recipe made about six 3.5-inch pancakes and one 2-in pancake (for H).

Since my throat is starting to feel a little irritated from the congestion, I blended up more of my decaf frappuccino, topped with my homemade heart. Love those things! When I run out of these, I will try to draft an actual recipe for them, in case you want to give them a shot before Valentine's Day :)

Since I had all of my studio equipment set up, I decided today we'd go ahead and have our Valentine's Day shoot I have been planning in my head for about a week. One morning last week, I cut out hearts, made a garland and some hearts for the kids to hold. Nothing too fancy.

H wasn't feeling well today (guess she feels like I do), and really only sat long enough for me to take about 7 frames. So, most of what I shot was with the boys...but they were really good sports about it, and we got some great shots!

Here are some "outtakes," since I can't really show you the good ones yet :)

The princess, pre-meltdown.

I love this picture, even though it is flawed in a few technical ways. It so represents who she is: curious, intelligent, tactile. I love that she figured out how the hearts were loosely taped together (that's right, boys and girls...you didn't think I had time for full-on crafts, did you? Three pieces of tape on each is all they got!):

Oh, my sweet, handsome eldest. He is so sensitive, and trying to learn how to be a good man. This is a difficult age, and an extremely difficult parenting season. How much responsibility is too much? How much direction and instruction is too much? How much is too little? He is no longer a child, but not yet a man. Sigh. This is a difficult time that requires me leaning on God more than ever for wisdom. What to say and when. I love his sense of humor. I love his compassionate heart. One sort of silly example that shows both of these characteristics is from several months ago. We were talking about the different specialty license plates you can buy. The kids saw one with a cat and a dog on the plate and asked what that one was for. I said that I thought it was to support no-kill options for animals. We discussed what that meant. With a teary sheen in his eyes, and after a long moment of silence, my sweet son said, "Well, when I'm older, I am definitely getting a puppy plate!" lol A puppy plate? lol! I smile just remembering him saying that. It was so cute and childlike, yet paired with the compassion and determination that shows he is maturing and getting older. How I love this child!

This is his least favorite picture, but I kind of like it. It's not the best in the bunch, but like I said, these are mostly outtakes, since the "good" ones are being saved for Valentine's Day.

Because I was posting Jerry's least favorite, I told him I'd post his favorite. This is the one he chose. I think he's pretty darn cute :)

Oh, silly, energetic, creative Josh. He easily selected the "Hug Me" heart, and that about sums him up. He has shown me that his love language is mostly physical touch since he was a newborn and would fall asleep the best when holding onto my finger. He loves to cuddle, and hasn't yet reached an age where it is uncool to hug and love on your parents or your siblings. He is the child that tries different hairstyles, trying different ones every day. He is adventurous and will try almost anything. Especially if you offer to pay him. lol He is a saver, and loves to save his money for bigger items, rather than spend it on little ones. He always knows exactly how much money is in his wallet. Recently, he told me that he was going to buy his older brother a new iPod Touch for his birthday (in June) using gift cards he got for Christmas. It made me cry that he was so willing to give up his money to do that. I asked him if he was sure, and he said he absolutely was. No hesitation. No prompting. He just loves his brother enough to do that. And that's how he loves - fully, completely, with reckless abandon. Love this sweet boy!

And, because I didn't want all outtakes posted, here is a preview of the shots to come. I love this silly photo!!

After all these pictures, I found myself completely drained. My allergies are in full force: itchy eyes, aching body, headache. It's all there. I got into bed next to H at her nap time, and fell asleep in about 5 seconds. It felt so good to get some rest! I woke up still feeling bad, but fixed my new favorite sandwich for dinner: the tempeh bacon, avocado and spinach on Ezekiel bread from yesterday. I had so many grains today! More than usual, so I think tomorrow I'll have to get back to more leafy greens. Maybe I'll invent a salad dressing tomorrow....hmmm....
.

Change the Atmosphere

2012-02-06T12:49:00.000-08:00

.
I am completely captivated by Kari Jobe's album, "Where I Find You." Particularly, the song, "We Exalt Your Name." It seems to capture my heart during this season. Here are the words:

Spirit come and change the atmosphere
Convict and open hearts to hear
The anthem that the angels sing
The worship of the King of Kings

For Jesus reigns
Over all He reigns

We exalt your name
High above the heavens
We exalt your name
All of creation sings praise

For Jesus reigns
Over all He reigns
Yeah...

Your presence fills and satisfies
Tears down the walls we hide behind
Oh, God of every aching heart
We long for you in light and dark

For Jesus reigns
Over all He reigns

We exalt your name
High above the heavens
We exalt your name
All of creation sings praise (2Xs)

For Jesus reigns
Over all He reigns..........

(emphasis mine)

The first line is my favorite. The prayer of my heart.

It is cold in the house today. Really, really cold. This old house just can't make up its mind, so instead of going back and forth, the heater just stays off. lol We don't really know what's wrong, but I can manually turn on the heater every once in a while just to keep it above 60 degrees in here. R put about 5 layers of covers on the bed and we keep making H get under the covers and warm up periodically! So funny.

In an effort to stay warm, I have been going up and down the stairs about a million times. Why not cook a little while I'm down there? Yeah, that's what I thought :)

So...my morning started pretty simple. An Ezekiel english muffin topped with a pumpkin butter I made using 2 parts pumpkin to 1 part almond butter (dry stevia to taste - I used less than 1/2 a packet), chia seeds, flax, and dried bananas. Real bananas would have been better, but I ran out yesterday, so I used some unsweetened banana chips. It was still really good...

** these are ALL cell phone pictures...sorry, but it is just too cold to worry about a real camera for these **

Then, I made some sugar-free dark chocolate bars. Because I unintentionally bought refined coconut oil a couple of weeks ago, and I do not have stevia drops, my bars were pretty spongy (that's what the refined oil and agave combo will do), even after freezing for a couple of hours. Taste-wise, though? Like a dark chocolate Dove bar. No exaggeration. I need to try the recipe using the right ingredients, and I'm sure it will be absolutely fantastic! No pictures of the chocolate bars...they just didn't look pretty, and if I showed you mine, you'd never believe me how wonderful they taste :)

Why did I make chocolate bars? Beside the obvious reason that I love dark chocolate, I wanted to make the mousse recipe posted today on www.chocolatecoveredkatie.com. So, I did just that. Using my spongy dark chocolate bars and all. And the results? Well, they sort of speak for themselves, but let's just say that this isn't any ordinary tofu!! I topped mine with some hazelnut meal I had frozen from when I made hazelnut milk a few weeks ago, five (yes, I counted) vegan semi-sweet chocolate chips, and a frozen heart (made out of my strange concoction that was supposed to be like whipped cream, but I didn't have the right ingredients...the results were too soft when at room temperature, but the taste is really good...it makes for a cute topper, especially around Valentine's Day!). In my opinion, the recipe makes about four servings. I put it all in one glass to chill it, but I could easily have put this in about four small dessert dishes. I did not add any sugar; instead, I just added my spongy chocolate (melted for this recipe) until I reached the desired sweet/chocolate flavor.

I couldn't justify just eating mousse for lunch (I had about two spoonfuls...), so I cooked up 2 slices of tempeh bacon (a serving size is really 3 slices and 100 calories, but I didn't need that many for a sandwich), and made a sandwich out of Ezekiel bread (toasted), miso "mayonnaise," spinach, and 1/2 a small avocado. My little natural vegetarian (little H eats my food, but hardly touches things most kids like - i.e., grilled cheese! Strange child...lol) ate about 1/3 of my sandwich, but that was okay with me! This sandwich is really filling...and really yummy :)

Enjoying the changes in my atmosphere...and expecting great things from the Lord today. If God has done something amazing in your life recently, I'd love to hear about it!! I believe He is still a God of miracles. I'll quickly share something that has sent my heart soaring since yesterday in church. There was a woman who does not attend our church, but came to a conference we hosted. She was in stage 4 of bone cancer. She was brought in on a cot by her friends (this makes me teary...remember the friends who lowered the man on a cot from the ROOF in order to get him before Jesus?) to ask for healing. She was prayed over. She did not immediately get better. A matter of months later, she was put on morphine, and was reaching the end of her time here on earth. She was reading in her Bible, and felt like the Lord led her to a particular passage, the beginning of which reads, "You will live and not die." Whew. This woman read the passage and felt the Lord telling her some things about her heart. She worked through those things with Him. She had a follow-up appointment with her oncologist a few days later, and the cancer was gone. Not just sort of gone. All the way gone. As in, stage 4 bone cancer was not even found in her body. If that's not a miracle, I don't know what is. It is amazing to me that the God I serve is performing the same miracles today that he did thousands of years ago. Am I the only one that feels intensely encouraged by that? He is the God who gives us hope, and hearing about miracles like that makes it impossible not to hope.
.

Clutter & Noise

2012-02-05T21:15:00.000-08:00

.
Exerpts from a fabulous book I read years ago...and started reading again last night:

"Dancing with God means that you have chosen to respond to His invitation. He said, 'Would you?' And you said, 'Of course. I'd love to.' It's an act of will. It is an intentional choosing to believe and rest in His strength. It's really your only responsibility. The prerequisite to dancing is answering the invitation...choosing God. But what happens with our lives is that we have to keep choosing. The world tries to cut in with _____ [she wrote, "unbelief," but I think you can insert a word of your choice here] and we have to decide over and over, do I want to stay right here with God? Will I keep believing?" (Thomas, p. 71-2)

In another section of the book, the author writes:

"...clutter comes to our souls. It's the stuff we've climbed over and ignored, thinking we'll get around to it eventually. Soul clutter is the collection of emotional, relational, and spiritual issues we have been stepping over. Each one needs to be picked up, sorted, and put away." (Thomas, p. 56)

As I read those sections of the book, I was really struck by the realization that I have a lot of clutter. Seriously. There is a lot of stuff in my life that just needs to be put away so that I can experience more of Him. I repented of many things that have occupied my time in such a way that it could almost be called an act of escapism...escaping the silence, escaping reality, whatever...I'm sure many women can relate. It wasn't intentional! I rather like my life :) Instead, it was as the author described it: like the items that you put on your stairs, intending to take them upstairs on your next trip up, but never do. You walk past it enough times, it starts to look familiar, and so there it stays (until a relative or friend visits, and you are forced to clean your house to a state of immaculateness...lol). Seriously, we do the same thing on the inside. Unresolved things that we say we'll deal with tomorrow, but never get to...and life moves by so quickly, that before we know it, it has been days, weeks, months, or even years. Scary.

This morning during worship at church, I felt like God gave me a picture in my mind: it was me, and I was dancing with Him (if you read the book, you'll know that is mostly what the author talks about)...but unlike the author's imagery, I was holding His hand, and I was twirling...and as I twirled, I got faster and faster, and it was like an outer shell was breaking into a million pieces and flying in all directions. Pieces were flying so fast, they were hitting the walls of the ballroom we were in. I started out wearing what I had on in church, but as I twirled, and the pieces were flying in circles around me, I was dressed in a formal gown - but I had perfect hair, perfect skin, perfect shape, etc...I felt glorious, and light...as if my burdens had been lifted.

Anyway, when I asked God what the pieces were, and what that all meant, I felt very clearly that the pieces of the "shell" that were flying and swirling away from me were the clutter, the distractions, the things I am letting go.

Then, during the sermon, I started having this nagging feeling that I needed to let a few specific things go. Gulp! It is easy to "let things go" when you stay generic. Not so easy when you start talking specifics! By the time I got into the car after church, I knew what I needed to do. I knew one thing for sure that I needed to give up. And I felt good about it. So, when I got home, I started the process of letting it go. At lunch, I told R that I felt so strongly that God wanted to move us forward, but we kept putting one foot in the past. How can we walk to where God wants us to go, if we are firmly rooted in where we were? If I am guilty of that, I don't want that anymore. After starting the process to let go of one specific thing, I felt like a huge burden that I didn't even know I was carrying had been lifted. It was so strange. I told R that it was almost like I had been carrying every single thing from my past with me as I tried to move forward. Only now the weight was lifted. I was free. How strange a feeling it is to be set free from something you didn't know ever held you captive? Amazing. And weird :)

Are you in need of a spring cleaning? Is there clutter in your life that needs to be put away? I know I'm not done yet, but I'm thankful for a God who is patient enough to point things out to me and wait for me to get around to cleaning it up. My time is now. No more procrastinating. I want it gone...now!

Ok...lest I beat a dead horse, I'll move on to another topic...one we all love: food!

As you have discerned, I am almost cataloging my journey into partial-veganism (lol - since I occasionally eat seafood and honey) day by day. It is an interesting change, and one I have come to love. I am still working out all of the transitioning of my pantry, fridge, freezer, etc...but I would imagine that's normal, and something that makes the journey all that more interesting. In the past 4 1/2 weeks I've been eating this way, I've lost about 12 pounds, I have an amazing amount of energy (that isn't coming from caffeine or sugar, since I've mostly cut those out), my headaches are gone, and I am thinking clearer than I have in a long time. I have come to love it so much that I've offered to pay my oldest son for every week he eats this way...lol...he says he's going to take me up on the offer this week. We'll see how it goes! hehe...it makes me laugh. I'm not really bribing my son to eat healthy, I'm just offering an incentive to take healthy eating to a new level :)

Two nights ago, it was stormy and I couldn't sleep! So...what do I do when I can't sleep? Why, bake of course! :D

I decided these looked pretty good, and my oh my, they were really, really good!!!

.....with some changes of course ;-)

I used 1C ww flour and 1C www flour, used agave instead of rice syrup, maple syrup instead of malt. Yummy. One tip when baking with agave: let the baked good rest for about 10 minutes before trying to eat it. There is something about it that needs to settle for it to taste right. It tastes sort of like alcohol right out of the oven, but when you let it rest, it rounds out to a sweet flavor just like sugar. I don't really want to dwell on why that might be, since I'd like to continue thinking of agave as a good sugar substitute :)

Moving right along...I was doing great this morning, but then my food choices sort of took a nose dive. I blame it on the Super Bowl. Sounds good, right? For breakfast, I had two brown rice cakes with about 1/2 tsp of almond butter on each, and about 1/2 a banana (total) sliced over the top. Add some cinnamon and a little bit of stevia, and voila! Instant healthy, vegan breakfast...if I wasn't in such a hurry to run out the door for church, I would have taken a picture. I'll try to do that next time.

For lunch, we went out to eat, since R wasn't feeling well. I thought he'd want some tortilla soup, but he ate tacos instead. lol I had my favorite build-a-bowl that I've fallen in love with: I get a crispy shell (if that's the only fried food I have, I figure I'm doing ok...the shell is small - maybe 4 inches in diameter?), black beans, salad mix, pico de gallo, and I sub guac for the meat. Add some salsa on top, and it is a really good fast food lunch! It always fills me up for a long time.

So far so good, right? Wrong. I got home, and as I was grading papers I started looking for a distraction (um, clutter, anyone?). Baking is always good for that! So, I made a carrot cake for one, and topped it with a fantastic tofu/nut butter-based "icing." Wanna see? Caution: it might make you consider going vegan!

Granted, I used applesauce and stevia in the cake (and spelt flour), and stevia in the icing (I used almond butter, by the way, in case you look at the recipe and wonder why the color of mine is slightly different...the original recipe calls for cashew butter)...but still. A cupcake? That's the best I could do? Sigh.

Things kept going downhill after that. The kids were looking for snacks, and so I got a wild hair to make vegan pop tarts. lol Don't ask! Here's how those turned out:

I used this recipe as a starting off point...but changed things as I went. First of all, I halved the recipe, because if I was going to pig out on junk food today, the last thing I needed was to tempt myself with SIX of these babies. Three seemed more manageable :)

I used white whole wheat flour, unsweetened almond milk and used Earth Balance spread instead of a stick of vegan margarine. The dough was pretty pie crust-like, so I did not roll it on a floured surface like the recipe said to because I didn't want to lose the flaky texture. Instead, I rolled out the dough in between two sheets of plastic wrap. I chilled the dough (in the plastic wrap) after rolling it into a rough rectangle shape so that it would be easier to lift off of the plastic wrap and transfer to the baking sheet.

After cutting the dough into six rectangles, I did use a floured spatula to transfer the pieces onto a lightly greased baking sheet. I used strawberry preserves (with chunks of strawberry) as the filling, and reserved a tiny bit for the icing. I ran out of the preserves after two tarts, so I filled the third with stevia, agave, and cinnamon.

While they were baking, I worked on the icing. I had leftover icing from the carrot cake, so I reserved a small amount for my "brown sugar cinnamon"-type tart. The larger amount, I mixed in my reserved strawberry preserves (I seriously was running out, so I may have been able to scrape out 1/2 tsp from the jar for the icing). I wasn't happy with the lack of fruit flavor, so I defrosted two cherries out of a bunch of fresh ones I froze early last week, smashed them with a fork and put the juice into the icing. About 1/2 tsp of liquid. I added a tiny, tiny, tiny dot of light pink food coloring to make the icing a little darker pink. Then the fun part! I took a packet of stevia and put a miniscule dot of the same food coloring onto the back of a spoon...then I started mashing at the stevia, until it turned pink. Can't have a pop tart without colored sugar on top, right?

The overall result was pretty fantastic. The kids loved the strawberry ones and asked me to make them again...soon. So, wanna know how to get your kids to eat sugar-free pop tarts made out of whole wheat flour? lol...top 'em with colored "sugar" and a creamy frosting-like substance :)
.

Nature

2012-02-03T14:11:00.000-08:00

.
**Started on Tuesday afternoon...posted today :) **

Today, our weekly field trip took us to the LBJ Wildflower Center, where we spent over five hours outdoors. The morning was overcast and looked a little like rain, but the clouds gradually burned off throughout the morning, allowing for a really beautiful day to spend outside! I think it is official: winter in south Texas is over. I've even started seeing butterflies. Guess spring is coming early this year!

Update: the groundhog says more winter...I'm thinking his prediction doesn't apply to my part of Texas :)

Spending all day outside has left the kids exhausted, which I can definitely appreciate :) We all have pink cheeks and noses from the sun, and we are all the kind of good tired you can only get from playing outside. As much as I miss colder temperatures, I'd be silly not to be thankful for the beautiful weather we had today!

With the grey cloud cover in the morning and wet remnants from yesterday's rain creating a glare when the sun came out, today was not really an inspired photography day...but I tried to get at least a few to document our adventure:

A fun truck and one of the trails we started down, only to realize the strollers weren't going to make it :) The boys went on the trail themselves, armed with a notepad and pencil to document the things they saw. We had a geologist, zoologist, cartographer, and helpers...Josh and his friend took it pretty seriously. One of them was responsible for drawing the things they saw, and the other wrote notes.

I think these might have been the only things in "bloom" in the whole place...lol

Inside what is called the "Little House" - it is such a cool building for kids! Art table, books, puppets, dress up, ecosystem, etc...

Jerry's friend reading, "The Hungry Caterpillar" to the little ones...so sweet :)

Jerry found a bat puppet...it was really realistic looking when he made the wings flap!

The boys thought this looked like the stone table from Narnia, so they decided to act out the scene...love their creativity today!

On our way out...

At our picnic area, we found a small bird's nest. No eggs, but a perfectly formed nest!

There is something about nature that gets me thinking. I read a historical fiction series one time that took place in Germany before/during WWII, and one of the characters had a beautiful rose garden on his estate. He took his daughter to the garden, and showed her how the garden was such an expression of God's love for us. He explained why pruning is necessary. Everything had a purpose and a spiritual significance: the soil, the sun, water, etc... This book put into words what I have often felt while outside. It's like everything in God's creation points right back to Him. The way the wind rustles the leaves into a song. The way the birds sing in harmony. The way leaves and flowers have perfect dimensions and are teeming with life. The way birds know to pick up sticks and (with no hands) form a perfectly round "home."

All of that is the nice and pretty stuff. What about the thorn bushes that pricked me today when I was trying to retrieve a football from a small thicket of trees? These same thorn bushes created a fortress around the bird's nest pictured above. These same thorn bushes created what seemed like a haven for a cardinal and his mate, who frolicked lightly among them...untouchable by the outside world.

Everything in creation speaks loudly of the Creator. I love it!!!

In my usual introspective fashion, all of this made me contemplate my own nature. My sinful nature to create a fortress within which to continue my sin...a private place I don't let God have access to. I plant my own thorn bushes, thinking it will keep things hidden. Yet, God wants to prune the thorns so that the beautiful trees within can grow freely and be more beautiful, bearing flowers and fruit. Is this getting too cliche? Sorry :P Let me try a different metaphor (I'm warning you, it might be equally as cliche!)...

We have a tendency to take control over things in our life out of fear. We secret the things we care about into private places where we think they are safer. We plant thorn bushes around them. Walls around those places in our heart. Just like the cardinals frolicking in the space, surrounded by thorns, we think we are safe. We think God can't see the wall of thorns we've built between us. We worship God, but our thorn bushes slightly obscure our view. If only the cardinals knew that they could use their wings to fly above the thorns (and enemies)!

We convince ourselves (as we lick our wounds from the thorns) that this must be what God has for us. We must be destined to live among the thorns. We begin to like the way it feels, all walled up inside the thorn bushes. We feel safe in our confined place. We think life is full. Life outside seems scary; risky.

Until God shows us how to fly. That He already created us with wings that will take us high above the thorn bushes. That will allow us to see over the tops of the trees and bushes obscuring our view. That will give us space to breathe. That will allow us to fulfill our destiny - we were created to fly, remember? To soar on wings like eagles...(Isaiah 40:31)

If you find yourself looking at God through the thorn bushes, allow Him to prune them out of your life. If you do it alone, you will get cut and end up broken and bleeding. With Him, they will be removed gently. Lovingly.

No matter the reason you've built the wall of thorn bushes, uprooting them will give you one guaranteed result: intimacy with Him. No longer will you be separated from Him. No longer will you reach for him through the thorns. No longer will you be confined. You can run into His arms, and be HELD. No more longing for that closeness you can't ever quite experience...you will be right there beside Him, joining Him where He's been waiting all along...waiting to wrap His arms around you. Waiting to protect you. Waiting to rescue you. Waiting to show you something bigger.

There have been times in my life where I have been in all different stages of the pruning process. Including my own planting season...lol...where I planted thorn bushes, but only saw roses. During this season, I am desperately clinging to Him and wanting the thorns gone. All of them. Roots and all, I want them gone. In so many ways, God has allowed many of them to burn away. I have torn at some myself. Sometimes, we don't even see them for the ugliness they are...

Lord, I ask that you show me the areas in my life where I have planted thorn bushes that separate me from you. Forgive me for not letting you have free reign in everything. For ever thinking that you wouldn't have my best interest in mind so that I needed to handle things myself. Help me to learn to trust you in every area of my life, instead of thinking I can hide behind my thorn curtain, playing Oz, trying desperately to control the things around me. Prune the garden of my heart until there is nothing left but that which comes from you. Draw me close. Hold me. Protect me. Love me. Thank you for your faithfulness. Thank you for your goodness. Thank you for your mercy. Thank you for your truth. Thank you for your promises! Thank you for your provision. Thank you for pursuing me to the ends of the earth. Thank you for your fierce love and protection. Thank you for your peace.

Blessings

2012-02-02T22:18:00.000-08:00

.
In reading through old blog entries, it is clear that I felt I was living in a very long dry spell over the last year or so. A time when I had to have faith in the midst of silence. When I had to believe in His promises, even though I wasn't yet seeing them in my own life. I prayed for favor in my job. Favor like Esther. God delivered (in a huge way!). Still, much of my life was in chaos.

Today, God has delivered on so many of His promises in my life. Promises to prosper me. Promises to be faithful. Promises to provide. Promises to give me hope and a future. In so many ways, God has delivered in all of those ways TODAY. Hallelujah! It feels like it has been so long in coming, but that waiting period was but a blink of an eye to my Savior...

"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine,

according to His power that is at work within us,

to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus

throughout all generations, forever and ever, Amen!"

Eph 3:20-21

To Him be the glory. He parted the Red Sea in my life today, and I am so very thankful. So thankful. It is interesting how He can so quickly renew our hope!

I have felt for years that I am called to do something, which I am not yet prepared to document for the world to see...there would be too much accountability there :) Along the way, I have jotted notes, written in journals, and studied in the Word so that I can one day do what I am being called to do. Since I have yet to commit to that vision 100%, I have ended up with a random collection of scraps of paper, books, etc...that always seem to get separated into a million different boxes each time we move. As I look for other things in the boxes, I always seem to run across these scattered items...and every time, it is so poignant a time for me to remember earlier times in my walk with the Lord, or different seasons that prompted different thoughts and prayers.

Today, I was looking for some tax information, and I came across a couple of journals. One scrap of paper inside held a lot of meaning for me today, so I'll share it! This was an intentionally short poem that I wrote about one facet of God's character: Hope. It was written at a time when I was leaving behind a life that had not been honoring God to pursue the destiny He had for me. I was dealing with feelings of inadequacy, guilt, shame, and unworthiness. I was coming "home" in many ways and dealing with the feeling that I would never be what I once was. Well, that part is true. But, the Bible tells us that He gives us hope (AND a future, I might add). Don't believe me? Just read Jeremiah 29:11! :)

HOPE

That moment when
your life can begin

Despite your flaws
despite your sin

Because the Lord,
Creator of the Universe

Takes up His pen
and writes the book...Again.

If you are leaving behind a host of things you'd never like to have to talk about or think about again, just know that you CAN move forward. You CAN come home. He DOES still love you. He WILL rejoice that you've come home (read about the Prodigal Son...Luke 15:11-32). You CAN be restored and made whole again. So, in the words of Chris Rice - "Fly to Jesus...and live!" Here are all the lyrics, in case you haven't ever heard the song. They are worth reading...

Weak and wounded sinner

Lost and left to die

O, raise your head, for love is passing by

Come to Jesus

Come to Jesus and live!

Now your burden's lifted

and carried far away

And precious blood has washed away the stain, so

Sing to Jesus

Sing to Jesus and live!

And like a newborn baby

Don't be afraid to crawl

And remember when you walk

Sometimes we fall...so

Fall on Jesus

Fall on Jesus and live!

Sometimes the way is lonely

and steep and filled with pain

So if your sky is dark and pours the rain, then

Cry to Jesus

Cry to Jesus and live!

O, and when the love spills over

And music fills the night

And when you can't contain your joy inside, then

Dance for Jesus

Dance for Jesus and live!

And with your final heartbeat

Kiss the world goodbye

Then go in peace, and laugh on Glory's side, and

Fly to Jesus

Fly to Jesus and live!

We celebrated today with an awesome linner (that's lunch/dinner at our house!) of paella and a vegan brownie and homemade ice milk for dessert. So yummy! Although I have adopted a vegan-type diet, as I've said before, I will continue to enjoy seafood occasionally (and honey). For today's paella, we had found a seafood mix at C*stco that included calamari, mussels, shrimp, and scallops. When we bought it, I told R I thought it would be perfect for paella, which I've never made before. I thought it would be really expensive by the time I bought the saffron and other spices I probably didn't already have in my pantry, but I was willing to give it a shot. That was, until we went to Whole F*ods and I found a jar that included the rice and all seasonings for around $8. I know, that seems like a lot for a jar of rice, but when you consider how much it would cost me just to buy a bit of saffron, the price seems a lot more reasonable. Let's just say that after making it, R and I decided this meal falls into our top 10 all-time favorite meals made at home!! So, so good. No wonder the chef that produces this jar of goodness won the paella challenge in Austin two years in a row! (go to http://www.paellamix.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=6&Itemid=53 if you want to read about it)

The brownie and ice milk? From my favorite vegan dessert website (www.chocolatecoveredkatie.com)! I made my brownies with whole wheat flour, splenda, and vegan semi-sweet chocolate chips. I used stevia in the ice milk. The kids loved it, which I consider a victory! :)

I know these are completely out of order, but why not start with dessert and go backward? lol

This morning's pumpkin bread in a bowl. Jerry styled this one for me, cinnamon sticks and all :)

Last night's vegan taquitos and spanish-style couscous. So good! Since I made up the couscous as I went, it could use a little refining :) The concept was pretty good, though, and the flavors of the cumin, peppers, and tomato really came through pretty well, all things considered! The filling for the taquitos tastes just like the bean dip you can buy in those little cans? Only this one is full of nutrients and real ingredients :)

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, adopting a vegan-type diet has done wonders for me. I feel so much better than I did just a month ago when I was eating everything. Ok...enough about food!

I started a post yesterday, and I am going to try to finish it tonight. In the meantime, I may include things that happened yesterday in this post. 'Cause I'm sometimes random like that. Ok, I'm often random like that :)

So many things happened in the world yesterday that stirred up conflict among the masses. Komen's announcement about Planned Parenthood funding sparked controversy all over FB. Sometimes, conflict like that gets me worked up inside and I don't even know why. I get irritated when I feel people are jumping into a fight without even knowing what they are fighting for. Which brought me to the next conflict: a well-known Christian music artist that I adore and follow on FB, posted something about "jammin'" to a secular artist. Boy, howdy! That caused a full-on theological debate within a FB thread. It was pretty silly. The legalism was hard to digest. It was awful. It made me sad and angry at the same time. Then, a newborn photographer posted pictures she had taken on her FB page, and other professionals began posting horrible comments about how she had committed child abuse, she should be reported, the posing of the child was so unsafe, etc...it was just mean. The photographer clearly needs some education on newborn safety, but I don't think any photographer would jeopardize the safety of a child for the sake of one photograph! Pictures can be misleading.

I had to take a break from FB, because there was just so much conflict! I was telling my oldest about it as I drove him to church. He couldn't believe a bunch of adults could be so mean. It's like bullying among adults. He couldn't believe that the Christians in the musician's thread were acting the way they were. We got to talk about God's love for us, and how God sees and knows OUR hearts. He doesn't then share what He finds with the people around us. So how could they possibly know my heart? My fruit would be the only way. What does my fruit say about my heart? Is my fruit plentiful and sweet? If not, why? What IS my heart? When I stand in worship on Sunday, singing "you are my everything," am I being sincere? Am I living it? Is my heart honest before the Lord?

Which brings me to my next revelation for the week. Years ago, I was struck by the sobering realization that there is nothing good inside of me that doesn't come from God. Truly, I am ugly as all get out without Him. I can't even worship Him without His help. Everything good in me is from Him. On Sunday, I was reminded of that. As I prayed for God to reach into the cobwebs of my heart and clean out every dark corner. As I asked God to create a clean heart..........so that I could worship Him completely! Hello!? I am asking Him to help me worship Him. Wow. What a crazy paradoxical thought.

Anywho...that was a side note. A freebie :)

In a Bible study R and I attended for several weeks at church, I met an amazing group of women. We related in so many ways...it was clear God had put our little group together with purpose. After the group ended a couple of weeks ago, we have still communicated via email. The praise reports from this last week have been amazing!! God is working miracles and answering prayers. He is fulfilling His promise to be faithful, that's for sure!!! It has been so encouraging. It reminds me of what the pastor said in our weekly group at one of our first meetings: that by verbally praising the Lord, something changes in the atmosphere around us. I think emails count, because that is exactly how I felt today as I was reading one praise after another!! That the atmosphere around me was changing, and all of a sudden I was authorizing MORE. More of Him. More blessings. More promises being fulfilled. Strange how that happens, isn't it? I can complain all day about whatever, but when I read a report that someone is being healed of a fatal illness, or that someone's financial needs have been miraculously provided for, my whole being shifts, and my eyes turn back to Him. My complaints melt away. I see more of Him. I want more of Him. Everything changes.

So...if you are feeling unfulfilled today, I would encourage you to change your atmosphere! Make a choice to praise Him. Start small, if you have to. Thank Him for loving you. For accepting you. Reflect on things He's done for you in the past, and see them as promises for what He will do in the future. Thank Him for His faithfulness. Thank Him for His provision. His healing. If you can't even muster up that much thankfulness (I've been there, so I know how that feels), then ASK Him to give you the strength to praise. Ask Him to show you the ways He has kept His promises to you. Ask Him to show you a promise in His Word that you can cling to in your current season. Or, just do what David did in Psalm 139:14, and praise Him because you are fearfully and wonderfully made. That's a good place to start :) It's not always easy, but it is always life-changing.

Psalm 105 does all of the above:

"Give thanks to the Lord, call on his name;

make known among the nations what he has done

(Talk about it! Tell others what God is doing in your life!).

Sing to him, sing praise to him; tell of all his wonderful acts

(Tell God what He has done in your life. He knows, but He wants to hear it from us! Praise Him!). Glory in his holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice.

Look to the Lord and his strength; seek his face always.

Remember the wonders he has done, his miracles,

and the judgments he pronounced

(look back at what He has already done and praise Him for it!)...

He remembers his covenant forever (He will fulfill His promises!!)..."

(commentary mine)

My prayer is that I learn to "seek His face always." That I learn how to consistently sing praises to Him, and thank Him for His promises. That I would always "give thanks to the Lord," no matter the circumstances.

UPDATE 2/3: In light of today's retraction by Komen of its initial decision to pull funding from PP, Russell D. Moore (Dean of the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary in KY) wrote an article that ended with perhaps the most poignant sentence that could be written about the Komen/PP debate:

"When it comes to the struggle for life, the color of victory isn't pink like a ribbon. It's red like a cross." Amen!!!

Weary? Come to Me...

2012-01-29T16:26:00.000-08:00

"Come to me, all ye who are weary and heavy laden,
and I will give you rest."

Matthew 11:28

I haven't heard this Scripture recently. I haven't read it in years. I haven't even thought about it in years. Yet, today during one of the most intense times of worship I have ever had, the Lord spoke these words. These exact words. Not a paraphrased version, or something similar. These exact words. If you have heard from the Lord, you know what I mean when I say, "spoke." I heard it in my soul as if it had been spoken aloud, yet I didn't hear a voice. My conscious mind wasn't even thinking about being weary or needing rest, yet that is exactly what God whispered to me this morning.

That wasn't all.

Every week, I start my worship experience by praying that His presence is felt in the children's classrooms. I follow the Spirit in my mind from one classroom to another until I get to the sanctuary. From there, I pray that the Enemy be bound from the room during church. That He not have any power over the people in the room while they are in church. That He be so present that we can FEEL Him among us. That He satiate the dry and thirsty. That His healing oil fall on people in the room that need to be made whole again. By the time I get done with this, I usually know the Spirit is upon us, because you can feel a palpable presence in the room. Others feel it too, and it is awesome. There is something about corporate worship that is so incredible. As I listened to the name of Jesus on my lips and the lips of those surrounding me, I was overwhelmed by the greatness of God. That there is enough of Him for everyone in the room to feel Him so strongly. That people all around the world, worshipping at the same time, can have the same feeling. He is big enough. He is mighty enough. He is powerful enough. He is loving enough. He is enough. There is no one like Him. He alone can satisfy the longing in your heart. He alone can bring you peace. He alone can turn the ashes in your life into something beautiful. He alone can love you in a way that completes you. He alone. Thank you, Jesus!

Today during worship, God gave me a distinct picture: it was me with my head down on His lap, and He was stroking my hair, telling me that He was there for me. I knew in my soul that He had always been there. That He loved me. I know all these things in my head, but this was MORE. It was like He came to my human form, and decided to meet me in my brokenness and show me in a way my human self could feel and understand. I felt safe. I felt loved. It was incredible. Such an intense time in the Lord. I felt like I was in His lap, and He was whispering these things to me. The presence of the Lord was so thick in the room, I thought I might fall backward. I started feeling faint; in my life I've learned that being in the presence of the Lord can make you feel that way. He is too beautiful, too mighty, too much for my human form to handle. I was overwhelmed. It was like Jesus himself was standing there with us. There was a point during worship where it was almost complete silence. It was at the moment when I felt the presence of the Lord was at its greatest. There was almost complete silence, aside from the music playing. I tried to speak, but I was silenced. My heart was almost completely stilled. All I could whisper, was "Jesus." I heard the same around me. It was like the presence of the Lord passed by, and we were silenced by His glory. Whew! If I could bask in that glory every day, there wouldn't be a single thing in my day that could rock me. Nothing.

For some of you that read this, my experience might freak you out, or make you think I have gone off the deep end :) Others will know exactly what I am describing from personal experience(s). Whatever the case, perhaps we can agree on this: that our God is loving enough to meet us right where we are, in the way that will most affect us. Maybe you don't wish to feel out of control the way I did this morning...as if something greater than you was grabbing the reins and taking you on a journey. That's okay. God knew that would be perfect for me during this season. The thing is, though, no matter what you consider the perfect expression of God's love to be, you have to be willing to accept it. You have to be eager enough to search for it. You have to seek Him. And when He shows you, my prayer is that you will know without a doubt that the Creator and Giver of Life is all you need.

"You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart."

Jeremiah 29:13

"Draw near to God and He will draw near to you."

James 4:8

"...in your presence, there is fullness of joy..."

Psalm 16:11

"When my glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft of the rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed by."

Exodus 33:22

A Double-Digit Birthday...

2012-01-28T19:57:00.000-08:00

.
The middle child turns 10!!! How exciting for him to finally break into the double digits :)

As I say every time I post about a birthday, we tend to prolong our celebrations. We seem to celebrate over and over again for the same birthday...lol I wonder what the kids will say and think as adults when they look back at how we celebrated at our house! I laugh just thinking about it. I hope they see how much we all love them, and know that we celebrate them completely.

On Josh's actual birthday earlier this week, we went to the Austin Children's Museum with our friends. Those boys ran around that museum for almost three hours! Good thing we planned an indoor field trip this week, because it poured while we were inside, and even hailed for a short time.

Some pictures from our trip:

This kept the boys occupied for a long time...making pigs fly! Clip the parachuted pig, use a pulley to send it up, and then make it fall into a series of holes. Great fun!

If the boys could do it, so can I...

How did they do this again?

Stocking the grocery store...

Recycled art!

Then, it was off to San Antonio for a birthday party with Nina and Papa!

A tablecloth that is 3D...awesome!

A sugar-free angel food cake...yummy!

Making O.L.'s Coke floats...we sure miss him. It was fun to make this memory with Papa :)

Checking out the 3D cars on the tablecloth and the napkin :)

Strawberries for the cake and turkey burgers (for the meat eaters), salad and veggie chips for dinner. It was delicious!

I stayed up very late last night working on Josh's cake for his party today. The kids like for me to make their birthday cakes...over the years, it has become a labor of love, since they seem to be getting more and more intricate each year :) This year, he wanted basketball as his cake theme. He wanted hoops and players, etc...so, we made a visit to the cake shop. I haven't used toppers in several years, but if ever there was a time, it is with a basketball theme! We found some great stuff to put on the cake...I just wasn't sure how I was going to put it all together.

Here's how it turned out:

Three layers of cake with strawberry preserve filling and buttercream icing. Josh loved it!

R was up all night working, so with a combined 7-8 hours of sleep between us, we tackled a birthday party at Main Event, a place with a huge bowling alley, glow golf, a climbing wall, laser tag, and arcade all in one. It is huge!! The kids (and adults) bowled, played laser tag, and played arcade games during his party. So much fun...Josh is still hyped up because he had such a great time this morning. Since we alternate years between having a "party" and just celebrating with family (or we try to alternate), it was worth the expense for him to have a really great time with his friends...friends he prayed for since we moved. How sweet it is when God answers prayers in a way that really makes His presence known to the children!

So, as I head off to bed, I'll end with pictures from the party...

One day, I'll get used to seeing him with his crazy hairstyles :) He likes to try out different ones...lol

Ha! I caught my 11-year old with a genuine smile...it's hard to do, but occasionally it happens :) He doesn't like his picture taken very often, and I don't force him. But if I happen to catch him in the act and he doesn't know I'm taking the picture....

The group of sweet friends and family that helped us celebrate today!

He is getting to be a pro at this blowing out candles thing...he gets enough practice every year! :)

His "guest book." He loves it!!!!

GRC & Food Talk

2012-01-24T21:00:00.000-08:00

.
Saturday was a fabulous day and a horrible day, all rolled into one!

The morning really started Friday night. The entire family struggled with going to sleep! Was it a full moon? It was that kind of strange..when midnight rolled around and we were all in our beds trying unsuccessfully to sleep, you know things are going to be rough in the morning. None of us ate or drank anything that would have made us stay awake...I haven't even had caffeine or sugar in three weeks!

So...Saturday morning was pretty tough when the alarm went off. I had a strong feeling when I woke up that we were supposed to be at the conference we were supposed to attend at church that morning and that all of this was just the enemy trying to keep us away. After the initial shock of the alarm, I was actually pretty excited about what God would want to teach me that day. R got up without a problem too, because he agreed that we must really supposed to be at church because of the amount of opposition working to keep us home!

Anyway, after we all got up, I made a quick breakfast of kodiak cakes with pan-browned banana slices and applesauce. I paired mine with a glass of homemade almond milk...it was a wonderful breakfast, and the kids loved it! If you are unfamiliar with kodiak cakes, check them out here. The ingredient list for our pancake mix (to which you only have to add water) is: 100% whole grain wheat flour, 100% whole grain oat flour, non-fat dry milk, dry honey (honey, wheat starch), leavening (sodium bicarbonate, sodium aluminum phosphate, monocalcium phosphate), egg whites, salt. Pretty simple, huh? Just the way I like it :) Technically, I am not supposed to have eggs right now on my fast, but I finished the 21-day fast on Saturday, so I figured the tiny bit in my one pancake wouldn't hurt anything.

(sorry for the terrible phone picture...again)

Then, it was off to church! We were signed up to attend a communications seminar...how to communicate in love. It was wonderful! R had to leave because his medications that he took were making him feel faint. Luckily, he was able to drive himself home to get in bed. Truthfully, I was very hurt and annoyed that he wasn't able to stay with me. Even though I know it wasn't anything he could change, I still felt abandoned in some ways. Part of my annoyance was that he knows better than to take this particular medication without food first. Whew. The bottom line is that I had to let it go, and he had to understand my hurt. Somewhere in the middle, he wanted to call the church and ask for a refund, because he said the seminar obviously didn't work on me...lol (he said it with a smile)! All was fine later, it just took a lot of understanding and grace from both sides.

Josh had recently read the Berenstain Bears book about a messy room that Hannah had left on his bed. He got all motivated to get his room clean, and so we went to the Container Store to get some ideas. We came home with some plastic storage bins for chargers, electronics, etc...and the boys got busy. Unfortunately, it was a little like beating my head against the wall. I felt frustrated that the boys don't seem to care enough to get the room clean. I felt disrespected because they weren't able to focus on getting it done after they were told to. I felt out of control, because I couldn't MAKE them do what I was telling them to do. It was a horrible, no good, very bad....few hours! lol Luckily, we worked through it (barely) and the boys were excited to have an almost-clean room.

That took us to Sunday morning. I woke up feeling a little depressed about everything that had happened on Saturday, and feeling a little reluctant to go to church at all. Not that I didn't want to go, it's just that I knew my heart wasn't where it needed to be, and no one likes to walk into something they know might be painful ;-)

It took probably the first five to seven minutes of worship to start to soften my heart. Really. I'm just being honest. Some days, our hearts just aren't ready to stand before the King and explain why they are in such an ugly state. I didn't really want to hand it over to Him, but at the same time I did. Does that make any sense? I wanted to feel free again, but that required me freeing R and the kids from the hurt, anger, and negative feelings they caused the day before. Sometimes it feels safe to stay in that wounded place. Why? I have no idea. Probably for the same reason some people live their entire lives with the victim mentality. I could guess that maybe it is fodder for the enemy, so he tries hard to keep us in that place, isolated from others and from God. Or maybe it is just human nature to lick our wounds. I don't know. I try not to stay in that place long, but sometimes I stay there longer than others. Regardless, by the end of worship, I was feeling whole again. I am so thankful to go to a church that welcomes the Spirit every Sunday.

So...having walked away from church feeling recharged and renewed, we went home to finish the arduous task that is the boys' room. They choose to share a room, even though we have a bedroom for both of them. This is sometimes wonderful, and other times really, really bad. When it comes time to clean, we usually end up in the latter category. It becomes all about who owns the item not put away, and/or who left it where it didn't belong. We constantly talk about not "blaming" someone, and just getting the task done. We invented a term at our house called Grace-FULL Room Cleaning, or "GRC." We take it seriously. If we decide to engage in GRC, everyone has to keep their mouths shut, and extend grace to everyone about everything...no blame, no comments, no sarcasm, just cleaning. It might sound silly, but it works for us :) If someone starts to attack someone else or vent about the mess, they are gently reminded that to receive grace, they must extend it...and we agree to do GRC again. I think it is awesome that the boys will do it, and they take it so seriously. Now, if we could just live our lives everyday, everywhere, in a state of GRC. Only in that case, it could be Grace-filled Regular Circumstances, or Grace-Ready Countenance :)

After what seemed like an eternity, the boys finished their room, we shampooed the carpet and now have a nice oasis for them...one where they can find what they are looking for...the first time! They are both very happy with it. Any bets on how long they keep it that way?!?? :D

In baking news, I made some pumpkin-filled chocolate cookies, based on this recipe. I made some changes, since I am not eating sugar...if you are interested in a lower sugar version of the original, here is exactly what I changed:

First, I used dark chocolate cocoa powder, because that's what I had in my pantry. Then, instead of the 1/4 cup + 2 T sugar, I used one over-ripe banana I pulled from my freezer, reheated, and mashed. Just to make sure, I put it into a measuring cup to make sure I was around 1/4 cup. Indeed, one banana is about 1/4 cup + 2 T. Because I was obviously adding more liquid, I cut out the extra 2 tsp of oil, and just used the 3 T ( used olive oil). I did use 2 T maple syrup (I ran out of agave making nutella). I also omitted the vanilla, because I ran out this morning. Then, for the filling, I found that for my taste, there was WAY too much nut butter (I used almond butter), and not enough pumpkin. So, having first made it with the original ratio, I added 2 1/2 extra T of pumpkin to increase the pumpkin flavor. Knowing I wasn’t using sugar for the cookie, and having run out of vanilla, I added about 1/4 tsp pumpkin pie spice on top of the called for cinnamon. I used the 1/2 packet of stevia.

The dough was gummy, but I sprayed a cookie sheet covered in foil with non-stick spray, and that allowed me to easily flatten the dough to stuff it and then pick up the edges to wrap the filling.

Oh, and the extra filling? I saved that, because it tastes like a fantastic pumpkin butter that I plan to add to my oatmeal or spread on my vegan english muffins. Win-win!

Here are some pictures of the process, taken with my phone, of course :/ Sorry! I was in a hurry to make these, because I had to get them done before I went to pick up Jerry from church.

The dough that I first rolled into a ball. Because of the banana, it was pretty sticky, but I just used my palms to make a rough sphere-shape. No need to be exact.

Sprayed the foil with non-stick cooking spray to help the cookie dough not stick when trying to fill it. Use your fingers to flatten the dough.

Use a small spoon to place a small amount of filling on the flattened dough.

Here's where it got a little tricky, but not by much :)

Use your fingers to gently pull up the sides of the dough until it completely surrounds the filling.

Before and after baking...see how the dough kind of looks dry and starts to look a little cracked? It doesn't taste that way, I promise!

In my hurry, I under-baked mine just a tad, but they were sooooo good that way! I waited for ten minutes after pulling them out of the oven to even touch them. I set the timer, because I knew there was no way I could wait that long otherwise :) After the timer went off, Hannah ate two of them immediately!! Guess they passed her taste test! lol They passed mine too :)

For dinner, the other night, the boys had picadillo tacos (in our house, that basically means potatoes and ground beef cooked in a skillet with onion, garlic, and seasonings like cumin), and I had some potato left over in the process. So, I started the basics of a soup for myself using diced potatoes, carrots, celery, onions and a little garlic, thinking I'd go in the direction of a vegetable soup. Instead, I used a can of tomato sauce and some black beans. All of a sudden, it started morphing into a vegetable chili. I added chili powder, a little turmeric, pepper, etc...and it was one of the best veggie chilis I've had (my favorite recipe uses squash and three different kinds of beans...so good!). I used a sprinkling of veggie shreds mostly for appearance :)

Another night, I made pozole (I've blogged about this before) for R and the kids. Since I had already chopped up all of the toppings for them, I decided to make myself something I could top with those things also! I started some quinoa on the stove and then began cooking some kale in my cast iron skillet. I had never had raw kale before, but I had heard it was kind of bitter, so I drizzled it with a tiny bit of honey after I finished wilting it in the pan. I had some leftover broccoli and cauliflower from earlier in the week, so I added those to the pan to reheat. Then, I started layering a bowl with quinoa on the bottom, then kale, broccoli, cauliflower, and then the toppings I had available for the pozole: cabbage, tomatoes, cilantro, radish, jalapenos, and avocado. The results were pretty darn fantastic. One of my favorite meals to date.

A few times a year, the kids ask to buy oranges so they can use the juicer to make orange juice. R loves this, so he always indulges them and gets different kinds of oranges. He then experiments to see which oranges make the best OJ. lol This time, we just bought one kind from Cost*o: Cara Cara oranges. They tasted so good, but after a couple of days in the fridge, the flavors just didn't marry the way we liked. It still tasted good, just not as good as the first day. We think we might have left too much pulp in the mix that made it lose its sweetness a little.

Thinking about how yummy the kale was in my quinoa bowl, I made kale again a few nights later. this time, I made it with an Asian-flavor inspiration. That doesn't mean I used Asian flavors, exactly, only that I was thinking of pairing the mix with the vegan egg rolls I had bought, so that's what was on my mind as I was preparing the greens. I used the leftover quinoa from the first creation, then sauteed the kale with some onions, red pepper flakes, a little tamari and a drizzle of honey. I topped it with sliced radishes for a little crunch and served it with my favorite egg rolls...which were the real reason I cooked anything at all :)

Another one of my favorite meals is a tofu scramble I make for breakfast. We had a busy day a little over a week ago, and my mom and I didn't get a chance to really eat much for awhile. We snacked on fast-friendly fare, but didn't really get to EAT. So, I went home and made my favorite scramble with hash brown-style potatoes, onions, a tiny bit of garlic (I can't resist...I love garlic!), spinach, and tofu (seasoned only with turmeric, salt and pepper here). I had some leftover vegetarian refried beans, so I smeared a little on the bottom of the bowl and then plopped my scramble right down on top. The salty flavor from the beans, mixed with the flavorful scramble was perfect. So good!

Earlier this week, I really wanted to bake something for dessert. This was what I chose. I had everything I needed, and it was going to bake in the microwave! I used dark chocolate cocoa powder, and I did not use the sugar...I used only a combination of applesauce and stevia (I don't like using too much stevia). Topped with a little cultured coconut milk (the only coconut product I have EVER brought into the house because of R's allergy. This was in a little yogurt container, so it was completely sealed, and I didn't let it touch anything else) and strawberry, and it was a perfect after-dinner treat!

My favorite meal this week? My southern-style chipotle sausage, spinach and cornbread (all vegan, of course)...with a decaf frappuccino on the side made from this recipe, with foamed soy creamer on top.

The inside...icy coffee goodness...so yummy, and sugar-free! Hard to believe. Even the kids loved it and begged me to make them one.

The meal...my absolute favorite this week. Field Roast Mexican-style Chipotle sausage with spinach and cornbread made from this recipe.

Healthy eating can be so much fun!! I am fully adopting the vegan diet, not for political reasons, but just because when I eat this way, I FEEL better. My body likes eating this way, so I see no reason to stop.

Now, this was a FULL post! One more picture? Okaaaayyyy....my favorite picture from last weekend (sigh. From my phone again...)

Quick Post (lots of pictures!) / Catching Up

2012-01-19T20:49:00.000-08:00

.
Life has been a whirlwind these last couple of weeks. When I wasn't editing photos, teaching online college classes, or taking on legal cases, we tried to have some fun :)

First, we started our semester with a plan to go on a different field trip every week. Our first adventure? The Texas Capitol building. It has been years since I have been there, and the kids had never been. We met up with Josh's little buddy from church, along with his mom and siblings. Turns out, his older brother is one of Jerry's friends from church, but they didn't realize the family connections! Jerry's friend was our tour guide, since he knows a lot about the building...it was fun! It was so nice to meet a new friend and have some adult conversation, while the kids had a great time.

Here are some pictures of the building:

Then, our second field trip was to the Natural Science Museum on the UT campus. It was really nice! Although H had a couple of meltdown moments, it was a good time. We went with her little friend and his mom. The kids got to see fossils of every kind. H looked at little shells and said, "pistachios!" It was too funny :)

Pictures of our trip:

There is a large version of this outside the entrance of the museum...

This skeleton was so cool! If I remember correctly, it was found in a local body of water (not sure which one, but pretty sure it was in Austin)...

Josh with the sabre tooth outside :)

Jerry and the sabre tooth :)

A pteranodon...this is the largest one ever found, and it was found in Big Bend!

Hannah taking a break from her stroller (and from her tantrum)...lol

The boys loved finding that these bones were from Bexar County!

A stunning rock...my picture hardly does its beauty justice:

Cool gems found on one floor of the museum...

After a day of walking around the museum, we went to a local restaurant that has a large outdoor area for the kids to play. They played for almost 2 hours! H didn't even stop to eat...just play, play, play :) The boys lovingly went down slides, played in the sand, and climbed with her for most of that time. Love how they love her! I had a salad with blackened tilapia (I know that to be a true vegan, no fish is allowed, but I am not really a vegan. I was on a 21-day fast that allowed me to occasionally eat fish, so I did! No shame here...it was fantastic! Since the fast, I have decided to continue eating a vegan-type diet, but I will occasionally eat fish because I like it, and I will occasionally eat honey for the same reason...lol):

A couple of nights last week, the dogs were barking incessantly, and we struggled to get them inside. R thought it was a possum. Sure enough, the dogs chased it up the fence one night...the poor guy tried to play dead, but he was clinging on for dear life :)

I will be working on a more substantial post for tomorrow...the Lord has been doing so much in my life and in my heart, but I haven't had any time to sit and write. For now, I need to go prepare for court tomorrow...a family case in a new jurisdiction...double "eek!"
.

Resolutions

2012-01-04T22:28:00.000-08:00

.
I am a very introspective person even on a normal day...give me a highly celebrated, well-known day for that purpose, and I tend to go a little over the top :) This New Year's resolutions are no exception.

Of the many I turned every which way in my head, one was what I would imagine every parent considered: to be a better parent.

A lot of changes have hit our little family this last year. Most of these were huge life changes that altered the way we interact with one another, the way that we spend our time, the places we go together, and well, the very way we live...or that's what it feels like, anyway.

Through these changes, I have felt successes as a parent, but mostly failures. Perhaps my most important resolution for 2012 involves my children. I want to be a better parent...but what does that mean?

When I think of a perfect parent in my head, I don't think of a person who bakes their own bread, makes their own pasta, and serves an all-organic fare...not that there is anything wrong with those things at all...in fact, I think they sound pretty fantastic!

Instead, I think of a parent that instills in his/her children a sense of self-worth because of who they are in Christ, who has taught his/her children how to seek God, and who has taught through example how to do just that.

I long for my children to love God. I want them to want to get to know Him. Certainly, I would never force God on my children or program them to do or say all the right things...what would be the point? God sees right through the facade. I want my children to honestly learn to love the Lord...and know that He is faithful. I want them to know their identity in Him. I want them to have a healthy self-esteem because of that identity...not because of how hard they can tackle, or how far they can throw the ball.

Hmm...but to teach them those things, I need to know my own identity in Him. I need to love Him. I need to do all of these things myself. Without cultivating these things in myself, how can I even hope to pass them to my children? I want to leave a legacy that revolves around my Savior. To do that, I need to cultivate that in myself.

So. It appears I need to work on myself before I can reach my resolution of being a better mother this year. The work I do on myself will be a labor of love...love for my Savior, and love for my children.

First steps? 2012 has already involved a major house de-cluttering, a schedule of outings planned once a week for the next two months (to show my kids a better way to deal with moving to a new city), the start of my annual fast, and an overall resolve to be more patient, a better listener, and more loving in every situation...even the ones that involve voices down the hall hours after bedtime...sigh. I didn't say I had it all figured out, just that I am resolving to make it different this year! :)

What are your resolutions this year? Are they different from last year's? :D
.

New Year's Eve

2011-12-31T18:39:00.000-08:00

.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

The Lord bless you and keep you;

The Lord make His face shine on you and be gracious to you;

The Lord lift up His countenance on you, and give you peace.

Numbers 6:24-6 (NASB)

Round One of the home pyrotechnics :)

Never too young to learn about self-reflection, setting goals, and how to make dreams a reality!

We finally opened the gingerbread house kit we bought a couple of weeks ago. Turns out, the kit didn't come with candy or frosting, so I used leftover homemade buttercream from the birthday cake I made last week, and we used sprinkles and candy we found in the pantry. Since some of the house pieces were broken (Ik*a lost a few points with me on this one), we gave up on the house and decorated individual pieces instead. We had so much fun!!! I may never build another gingerbread house again...it was so much fun just decorating the pieces :)

Josh's creation...

Jerry's masterpiece...

Awww...

Hannah wasn't about to let the boys have all the fun...she reached over to Jerry's "cookie," picked up a gum drop, licked it, then put it back...we could not stop laughing. It was so funny!!

Final remnants of leftover buttercream piped over strawberries...which were then rolled in various sprinkles. Sugar overload, but very yummy!

Josh thought this looked like the key to his gingerbread house...

I just love fireworks. Seriously. I consider it my personal challenge to capture new and exciting fireworks pictures with every relevant holiday (4th of July, New Years, Memorial Day, etc...). I change up my camera settings each time - sometimes I use a tripod, sometimes I don't. I usually like long shutter speeds when taking pictures of fireworks in the sky (as in about 4 seconds, so a tripod is necessary) to really get the streaks, but this time I used a quick speed - 1/125, with f1.4 (50mm/f1.4 lens) and ISO 800. I loved the results! It really worked with the fireworks we bought this year...when they explode close to the ground, a faster shutter speed (but not too fast) is best or you'll miss it!

Round Two of our home pyrotechnics show:

We liked these that stayed close to the ground, but gave some really pretty colors and bursts. So pretty!

R makes me laugh - he doesn't take the time to read the labels on the fireworks (he is familiar with most of them), but he is very safety-conscious. He makes sure the ground is wet, the fuse is safely lit, etc...he teaches the boys the same caution (which I love). The funny part is that he doesn't always know what the firework will do, because he hasn't read the label. He just knows that it is aimed safely, secured in that position, and safely lit no matter what happens...lol. Trying to take pictures can be tricky in that scenario, because you never know if you need to aim up at the sky, or stay down low. This one, for example, caught us by surprise as it flew right into the sky...what a pleasant surprise!!

More of our favorite "little guys..."

Josh lighting the tank...he usually loves these, but the one we got this year didn't seem to be the same as the ones we have bought in the past. In the past, the tank shot out discs or something that spun and sent out sparks, etc...but this one didn't do all of that, much to Josh's disappointment. He and Jerry still said this was the best day since Christmas...lol!

Christmas & Birthdays...time flies!

2011-12-31T18:32:00.000-08:00

.
Busy ~~celebrating~~ supervising New Year's Eve with the family...nothing like boys and fireworks! I wanted to get this post up before the end of 2011, though, so it will mostly be pictures.

H had two birthday celebrations this year: one on her birthday with one set of grandparents, and one on my birthday a week later with her other grandparents. This was a special birthday for me because I got to share it with my 2-year old :) I had so much fun making the cake, an idea I got from P*nterest...

Here are some pictures from her special days...we went to breakfast at a place in town that specializes in pancakes, then it was off to Ik*a and then Marble Falls to have dinner with one set of grandparents and to see the Christmas lights by the water. On my birthday, we went to Ik*a to purchase the item we had looked at a week before, then drove to San Antonio where we celebrated H's birthday (and mine) with the other part of my family. It was so much fun!

I think this is how it works...

Banana pancakes...

The first birthday cake...a decadent chocolate with chocolate shavings around the outside. H started picking at them before we even sang "Happy Birthday!"

Such a fun light display...I think it has gotten bigger since we last went!

Hmm. At least Santa and Grandpa are smiling...lol. Poor H didn't really like Santa. She recovered about two seconds after she was removed from his presence :)

First round of presents...older brother reading her the card. Such a sweet brother :)

The ombre swirl cake I saw on P*nterest and knew would be perfect for H's birthday! So fun to make, although it took me awhile to get the hang of all the food coloring. The cake layers really took the brunt of the experimentation :) By the time I got to the outside icing, I had gotten better! Homemade vanilla cake with homemade vanilla buttercream icing. So, so rich, but so, so good :)

Half dressed, wearing part of her princess outfit from her aunt and uncle. She loved it!

Not sure about the attention and singing, surprisingly! I think she just wanted to eat cake without all the fuss :)

Much better, now that Daddy is nearby.

The inside...

Her Christmas doll with "Hannah" embroidered on the dress. Appropriately, H has named this doll, "Baby Hannah."

More presents!

Ahh..."beautiful" music from the mouths of babes...lol

But doesn't that look make up for it? Sigh. I can't believe she is another year older. Hard to believe time flies by so quickly.

For the record, I have tons of pictures of the boys from Christmas, but since one of them decided not to wear his shirt that morning, I am limited as to what pictures I can post...not that I don't trust the Internet, I just try not to post anything I wouldn't want to see 100 years from now :P
.

December = Winter??

2011-12-22T00:09:00.000-08:00

.
Just a quick post with some pictures of our recent scenery...looks like Fall, but it is really winter here in Texas, I promise!

One of my favorite signs of cold weather:

Different animal, but I think she'd look great with a red nose?

Winter means a visit from our favorite cardinal(s)!

Finally, the leaves fall from the trees...it is only near the end of December, you know :)

The view from our balcony...love the warm hues!!

I feel like he's mocking me...he is inside, while I am outside in the rain. lol

Rain, and more rain...not that I'm complaining; we went so long without it, I'll take anything that comes our way, even if I'd much rather see snow :)

Leaves, and more leaves!!

Yes, most of our plants (and grass) are finally turning green...a few months late. It is a strange feeling: knowing it is near Christmas, but being surrounded by Fall!

Stationery card

2011-12-14T11:39:00.001-08:00

Joyful Memories Christmas Card

Personalize your holiday card this Christmas with Shutterfly.

View the entire collection of cards.

Dinner with Family

2011-12-10T17:31:00.001-08:00

Those who know me well know that quality time is my love language. Gifts and physical affection are great, but they don't make me feel loved the way that spending quality time with me does.

When my brother asked if we could meet for dinner, the answer was, "sure!" Quality time is always something I will schedule around.

We had such a great dinner; we sat outside with space heaters, and the weather was perfect! The kids heard an owl, so they went to investigate. H is still talking about the owl that went "whoo, whoo, whoo."

I have started trying to get into the habit of taking my camera with me everywhere, just in case I want to take pictures...this is my effort to move away from so many phone pictures. So many times, I have been happy that I had my "real" camera! Because I don't want my bulky flash and camera in my purse every time I go out, I leave the flash at home...this means that once the sun goes down, I push my camera to the limits with higher ISOs. Generally, I am unhappy with the way my camera handles these low-light situations, even with a fixed 1.4 lens. At the end of the day, I'm just glad I have a picture of the moment, so the grainy shots don't really bother me :)

Like these of my sweet nephew:

Or this one:

I love being able to document my sensitive eldest, who is currently trapped in a pre-teen body full of crazy hormones and mood-swings. He still makes me so proud. Like iron sharpens iron, God knew I needed this child to force me into the person God wants me to be. Similarly, God knew my son would need me to shape him and point him toward the Savior. What an honor. I want to teach my son to love Jesus as much as I do. Too bad parenting doesn't come with a manual that teaches us how to do that! Every day, I fail. Every day, I realize that it isn't up to me...that God will pursue him to the ends of the earth long after my strength, intelligence, or plan has failed me. He loves him that much. He loves YOU that much.

Brother-sister moments like these warm my heart. I love, love, love the way my sweet boys dote on their sister. They love her as much as I do, I'm pretty sure. Our lives wouldn't be complete without this spunky, crazy-smart, headstrong addition :)

The cousins, listening for the owl. I love the way they are all looking in different directions, but J and Mr. T are having a moment. So cute!!

This silly girl was reaching the end of her day...so when I asked her to turn around and look at me, this is what she did. LOL She can always make us laugh!

On that note - I hope you remember to take your camera with you, because you never know when a moment like this one will present itself...and you'll be so glad you had a real camera to document it :)

My next post will be more thoughtful...but I am still digesting last Sunday's sermon and need a little more time before I can document my thoughts about it. Also, busy editing wedding photos!!! Off I go...

The Mr.'s Birthday!!

2011-12-05T15:00:00.001-08:00

.
The Mr. prefers not to have pictures of himself on the blog, but here are some pictures of the kids enjoying his birthday dinner last week! We had a great time, and had really missed eating at our favorite restaurant...it was a nice treat :) Very cool that there is one just across the highway from where we live!

Staying entertained with the kids' menu

Chopsticks for everyone!

Even the princess!

This was the man watching over us while we ate...lol

These desserts were displayed right near our table, so we had to look at them all through dinner...they were so pretty, Jerry took a picture for the blog!

We can't decide whether we like it better in color, or black and white. What do you think?

The first courses...

The main courses! Always the same things, every time we go :)

For R's birthday, our server let us pick a dessert. We picked banana spring rolls, not realizing they were served with coconut ice cream...oops! R couldn't eat it because of his severe allergy. The rest of us enjoyed it though :)

Happy Birthday to R/Dad/Daddy....happy birthday to you!!

With a little help from H...

Not to send the birthday boy home without a dessert, the server was kind enough to send home some of the lemon parfait-shot-type desserts (pictured earlier) with us.

Happy Birthday to my sweet husband!!
.

Friday Fun-day!

2011-11-26T13:55:00.001-08:00

.
Every year, I say there is no way I will leave the house the day after Thanksgiving. Every year, we do it anyway :)

Yesterday was such a fun-filled day, I am still tired! Here are LOTS of pictures of our day:

We went to our favorite discount warehouse, where H found this toy to keep her occupied. She didn't want to get out! We might have to consider this for a Christmas gift, since she loved all of the buttons, the radio, the lights, etc...

She said, "bah bah bah" into the radio. Not sure if she was trying to say, "blah, blah, blah," but it was pretty funny!

Then, we went to pick out our Christmas tree! H ran and ran between rows of trees, smelling them, hugging them, hiding behind them...it was crazy, but fun for everyone. My two J's helped pick out our perfect tree, with R helping analyze them :)

Running...

More running...

I think I climbed through a tree to take this picture...she was hiding in a tiny spot between about four trees!

Giving our tree a hug...lol

Hugging the tree looked like so much fun, J decided to try it too! Silly boy...

Big brother and the little toot. This was a rare moment when she was fairly still...not completely, but almost!

Our tree's beautiful branches...kind of makes me want to hug the tree too! :P

We had fun following our tree from start to finish. After picking it out, it was put inside this barrel to wrap it, and for the bottom to get trimmed.

There goes the bottom 1/2 inch of the tree!

All wrapped up and ready to go to its new home...

Next, it was off to purchase lights for our Christmas tree, since we had to get rid of so many this year due to a rodent problem in our garage (which has been taken care of, thank goodness!):

R found this silly hat, which she kept on for all of about 10 seconds...we didn't buy any hats, but got some good fun (and cute pictures) out of them while in the store! :)

Take this off!

"Where'd Hannah go?"

Josh wanted a picture of himself saying, "ho, ho, ho!" in his silly Santa voice! :)

You really want me to pick out an ornament like this one?

H liked it, and so did I...

Once we had a little down time, Josh spent it playing with his early Christmas present. He was right, instead of what he waited in line for Thursday, he got something so much better! This is his favorite Christmas present so far. Well, it's not really a Christmas present, even though we are calling it that, because it was paid for using money he has saved in a bank account for two years. He has kept track of that money, always knowing exactly how much he had. He could not be happier with his choice of how to spend it!

Older brother was going to spend his money on one too, but wanted to wait and see if there was something better...but I have a feeling we will be going back to the store to get him one just like Josh's in a couple of days :)

After some much-needed rest, we met up with Grandpa Steve and Grandma Mary for dinner! Before eating, we walked around a little bit, and saw some cool things (and H got to run.......again).

After dinner, the kids got to sit in Grandpa's Corvette, which made Josh especially happy! He sat in the driver's seat and pretended to drive...currently, he wants to be an eye doctor, so maybe he'll get his own car like this some day! Jerry said he wanted to know how people in movies got out of Corvettes so smoothly...in real life, it doesn't work that way. He kept trying to not look like he was falling out, but never quite got it down. He got a good laugh out of it, though :)

We were all so tired when we got home, but determined to at least get our tree up and decorated. I am the designated light-lady, so I got to work as soon as we got home. So many of our ornaments were lost to the same rodents that destroyed our lights, which made us all sad. A lot of our favorites were saved, so we were thankful for them!

So these were our adventures on a crazy Friday...I hope everyone else survived the madness that follows Thanksgiving!
.

Thanksgiving 2011

2011-11-24T23:03:00.001-08:00

"Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift!"

2 Corinthians 9:15 (NAS)

What a day! Although we weren't able to spend this Thanksgiving with our "real" family, we spent it with friends who we consider family!

This year was full of things that made me laugh. For example, shopping out of necessity for Thanksgiving the evening before. I figured that if I survived that experience, I deserved a medal. Or at least a flawless Thanksgiving meal. :)

Well...the oven in this house is old and very small. I knew that in order to finish all the sides in time for lunch, I would need to bake the ham in the middle of the night so that it would be done before all the rest of the food had to go in the oven. Good idea, right? Hmm. Did I already say this oven is old? That means no auto-on, timed bake, or auto-off options. Yikes! That means I had to set two alarms on my phone: one about halfway through baking so I could baste, and the other at the end so I could turn the oven off. The basting timer went great. R woke up once and basted too, so I thought we were rockin' and rollin' on this ham-in-the-middle-of-the-night idea! That was until I woke up two hours after the ham was supposed to be finished and realized my second alarm had not gone off (or I have gotten very adept at turning it off while still asleep...both are real possibilities). Eek! I blinked a few times to remember where I was and what I was supposed to be doing, rolled out of bed in a sleep-fog, limped down the stairs with my knees still fast asleep, and limped/ran/stumbled into the kitchen to see how bad the damage was. Well, let's just say that I haven't seen a ham with such dark coloring before :) I thought it was ruined, but when I sliced it I realized that it wasn't horrible on the inside. Hooray! I started laughing, partly because of my sleep haze, and partly because it was pretty funny. I don't recall ever "messing up" anything for Thanksgiving in at least a few years, but this was like something out of a tv sitcom!

Then, still fighting fatigue after my interrupted ham-basting sleep, I decided to make breakfast for the kids. A special breakfast...thanks to my new love, P*nterest. It called for a can of buttermilk biscuits - check, brown sugar - check, syrup - check, butter - check, and a fluted pan...uh oh. Would the pan I use for my angel food cake work? Hmm. Part of me thought, sure! The other part of me thought, "I think I remember problems with liquids cooking in this pan leaking out around the ring where the two pieces of the pan come together." I vetoed the second part of me, and forged ahead. It looked and smelled great! About ten minutes into cooking, however, I detected a distinct burning sugar smell. After the ham fiasco, I was pretty sensitive to the smell. lol I went into the kitchen to take care of it, but there was no room for me, as R was cooking his special casserole. Sigh. The perils of a tiny kitchen! R wasn't happy with me for taking time to cook a breakfast dish so close to when we would be eating a huge lunch, but it was Thanksgiving morning! A nice, sugary breakfast is required. I threw a cookie sheet in under the pan, since it turns out the second part of me was right after all: the pan I chose wasn't a good choice. It all turned out okay, even though I cleaned up blackened sugar at the bottom of the oven later :) The biscuit cinnamon rolls were so good...another P*nterest success! I don't have a picture, because the kids and R ate them almost immediately.

After these early, eh...challenges, I laughed and wondered how the day would go. It was fabulous! The food was great, the company was special, and everyone had a good time.

R fried a turkey this year, and was soooo excited about it. This isn't the first time we've done it, but it has been a couple of years, and he was ready to give it a go. It was a production, but a fun one :) Here are pictures of the turkey going from marinading pot to fryer...and the cute chef who took his job seriously (and it paid off! That turkey was amazing!):

Two of the spectators :)

There it goes!

I don't have any pictures of the food from today. I hate it when that happens, but experiencing life is always my priority, not taking pictures of everything. I did, however get some pictures of the half-eaten pies. lol I made three this year: apple, pumpkin, and what I am choosing to call cherry berry pie. Josh helped me core, peel, and slice the apples for the apple pie. He got tired, but was a real trooper for that one. If you know my apple pie, you know I prepare three to four pounds of apples for one pie. It takes awhile, but it is so worth the effort! This year, we used apples from our favorite orchard in Medina, but we didn't have the full three pounds (turns out some little people have been eating my apples!). Oh well...it still tasted great, and I was NOT about to head back to the grocery store after just surviving my first trip. R had to go to the store for one of his casserole items, and he said he'd get me anything I needed. I asked for a can of cherry pie filling, since that is one pie I never make the filling for...the canned version is perfect! He called to say there were no cans. Ok...how about a bag of frozen cherries? Nope. Those were out too! So, he bought me two bags of frozen cherry berry mix, which included blueberries and other similar berries. I made the filling and made my first entirely made up, homemade cherry berry pie :) lol Is it just me, or does it seem like there is always at least one ingredient you are missing in a recipe when you cook for company? That happens to me every time. I am always winging it and hoping it works out :)

Here are the pies:

Btw - the spots on the pumpkin pie are little pieces of cloves. Turns out I didn't have ground cloves, so I smashed some whole ones :P

After eating an enormous amount of food, the little one took a nap, and I reviewed the deals for Friday. It is tradition that R stands in line at a store for something we pick out. This year, we had something in mind for the boys' Christmas present. Then, I realized the store we always go to didn't open at 5am, the way it has every year before this one, it opened at midnight! I was pretty sure this would mean there were already people in line and we missed our chance (it was already almost 7pm at this point), but R was willing to give it a shot. The boys left for their line adventure, while H and I stayed home and cleaned up. Ok, so we might have done a little eating too, but no one else was here to witness that, so we can't be sure.

Missing the boys after not very much time, H and I took them coffee and hot chocolate. We waited with them for awhile, and we all left disappointed, but receiving the news we expected: the item we wanted had all the vouchers already handed out. Oh well. The boys had a great time just standing in line, since R usually does that alone (traditionally, he is in line from about 11pm - 5am, so the boys have always been sleeping). Here are some pics from their adventure:

Josh told me that he prayed there would be his item for him at the store. I told him that was wonderful, and that God had a really special plan for him...in every way. I told him that if God wanted him to have this particular item, there would be one. If not, it meant God had something better in store for him. After finding out that there were no more of what he wanted, Jerry was disappointed. As we were walking to the car, I heard Josh say, "it's just like Mom said, God has something better for us. He must not have wanted us to have this one." Inside, I cheered. I love how my children often demonstrate what childlike faith looks like. To believe wholeheartedly, without anything getting in the way. Just pure faith. A lesson I can learn from them.

Speaking of lessons, today I heard something rather strange in my soul as I was driving. I was thanking God for so many things, when all of a sudden, as clear as day, I had the thought that I am/should be thankful that a sacrifice is no longer required for us to come before God. How strange, right? I was thinking warm and fuzzy thankful thoughts when, bam! There was this one. I knew it came from God, because it was such an unexpected and untimely thought. And then it wouldn't go away. So, I let my mind turn over this thought until I felt I had arrived where God wanted me to with it. I suppose the slaughtering of the turkeys for Thanksgiving are somewhat reminiscent of the slaughtering of the lambs that were done for sacrificial offerings - of praise, of thanks, out of a need for forgiveness or from a place of repentance. We sort of sacrifice a turkey for the purpose of experiencing thanksgiving (the lowercase version, not the holiday). Before Jesus, it was a lamb.

How thankful I am that God sent His son, Jesus, to die for my sins, so that I no longer have to sacrifice an animal for forgiveness of my sins. Jesus became that sacrifice so that I no longer have to DO anything to receive His forgiveness. The debt has already been paid. The sacrifice has been made. I can come freely before His throne and ask for His forgiveness...my sin no longer separates me from God (He can't look on sin), because the blood of Jesus (the sacrifice) covers me (and my sin)...so God can look upon me without seeing the sin - He only sees the blood of Jesus that covers me! I suppose this is the thing I should be most thankful for today. I think I am. I wonder if I show my thankfulness for His sacrifice enough.

When I cook a nice meal, or clean, or give a gift to my children, I am sometimes hurt by what I perceive as ungratefulness. Yet, God sent His son to DIE for me. Do my actions or attitude make me appear ungrateful? Does that hurt God? I hope not. I hope that I can always stay thankful (and aware) of His sacrifice for me. I hope that this is the first thing I am thankful for...His indescribable gift!

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Editing the Details

2011-11-14T23:37:00.001-08:00

.
Today was full of pictures! Not the fun kind, where I get to go out and take new ones, but the process of culling and reviewing the ones I've already taken. Yuck! Not my favorite part :)

One day, I will pay someone to go through the process for me so I can constantly be out taking new pictures and never, ever have to open a photo-editing software program again!! Oh, happy day!!

In the meantime, I can't be such a prima donna! lol

I really enjoy the first part of the process, though...the excitement of seeing someone look so beautiful, or seeing a part of the shot that I caught by accident, because my eye was focused on something else through the lens.

For a large part of the day, I have gone back and forth between different sessions...probably not the most efficient way, but the only way I know to avoid tunnel vision. I want to see the pictures with fresh eyes the entire time.

For my "break," we went to Central Market, which we loved in San Antonio. The one here didn't disappoint...the boys sampled everything possible, while I tried to remember the things I actually needed without losing focus! We only brought home one "extra" item: freshly baked cookies called Blueberries & Cream. I must, must, must figure out how to make an even healthier version of these! They taste like a blueberry streusel or muffin, but in the form of a cookie. So good!

Hoping to get some sleep before I start all over again with the pictures tomorrow...before I go, I'll post one picture. Well, really it's three in one, because I'm feeling generous :) A wedding is so often what it is because of the details. These are just a few of the shots I took of the little things that contribute to the whole...amazing how everything in life can be a lesson. What are the details that are contributing to the whole in my life? More specifically, what are the character qualities and behaviors (details) that I am exhibiting for my children...and what does my family look like (the whole)? Hmm...perhaps I will ponder this as I am falling asleep tonight...I know what I want the whole to look like, but is it there? What can I change about ME to get us there? How can I edit the details of my own portrait until it looks the way I want it to?

Portraits & Wedding Jitters

2011-11-11T19:19:00.001-08:00

.
I had such a great day today! It started with two amazing photo shoots with some incredible people. Seriously. Such sweet kids (and moms)!

For the first session, I headed out to the mall near our neighborhood. What a cool place for pictures! I know I said something about it yesterday, but today I really got to see some different areas, and the morning light through the trees and reflecting off of the buildings/store windows was beautiful. It was like having built-in softboxes and diffusers along the way. Of course, the fact that this family was gorgeous didn't hurt...lol

As I quickly scanned through the pictures, I picked about seven at random, trying to get ones at different photo spots. Here are the ones I chose (and these aren't even the best photos in the bunch, they just got lucky when I closed my eyes and pointed at the screen!):

Then, I headed straight to our family's favorite neighborhood park (there are three, but this one by far tops the list) to meet my next subject: an adorable, curious, active girl who kept me smiling throughout the shoot. She and I explored the backside of the park, stopping every once in awhile for pictures. I love shoots like that, and hope that this sweet girl's ideas about getting her picture taken have changed for the better :)

Like with the first session, I randomly picked a few photos:

Tomorrow, my friend from law school gets married. Sigh. I just get all sentimental when I think about it. I don't really know why, except that my heart is so happy for her that I can't express the emotion any other way. At the same time, I am sooooo nervous. I love weddings, but am always so nervous that I will miss a shot or mess up. I've been told by successful, full-time wedding photographers that this is normal. Whew! I certainly hope it subsides over time, because it makes it hard to eat or focus on anything except the day, which I keep running through my head in different scenarios...over, and over again. What if this goes wrong? What if this person is late? What if the sun is too bright for the group photos and there are no shady spots? What if................arrrrghhhhh! I just keep praying, as I do before every shoot, that God gives me the eye to see what He sees, the hands to document it, and the technical know-how to survive any curve balls :) So....{{deep breath}}...that is my prayer for tomorrow. Especially for tomorrow. My friend and my client...I hope my pictures make you happy!!

With a big day ahead of me tomorrow (including a drive to and from San Antonio), I am headed to ~~bed~~ aimlessly search for things on my iPad until I ~~fall asleep~~ can't keep my eyes open any longer!
.

This is Your Day

2011-11-09T22:00:00.000-08:00

.
I know these are horrible pictures, but my cell phone doesn't work in low-light very well. Sorry! The point is on the plate, though :)

This is YOUR day! Claim it and live it to the fullest. I received news today that a good friend's father finally left the hospital after surviving at least one near-death experience. A miracle is the only way to describe it. God has plans for this sweet man! In the short-term, he gets to walk his daughter down the aisle on Saturday...it will be an emotional moment for both of them, I am sure. Praying that God helps me capture that precious moment with steady hands and all the technical mastery I can muster with my camera.

Thinking about this made me realize just how wonderful life can be! So, if nothing else in your life seems like celebrating, pull out your special plate, bake some healthy cookies, and CELEBRATE life. Celebrate God's mercies that are new every morning. Celebrate the miracles that prove our God is alive!! He is the same God that walked with Stephen as he stood on trial before the Sanhedrin. The same God that ordained the steps of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. The same God that sent his Holy Spirit so that we could enjoy the feeling of closeness with our Creator. There is so much to celebrate, even in the midst of circumstances that may not make us feel "happy."

In the spirit of celebration, I made an apple crumb cake...and it was awesome. Everyone in my family loved it and wanted seconds. Topped with a little frozen whipped topping, and voila! Apple pie a la mode. Yum.

I know I shouldn't use my cell phone for pictures so much, but when it comes to food (especially desserts), I usually have a very small window of opportunity to get the shot before someone in the family starts digging in (I'm not going to name names). Maybe one day, I will start being "official" with my food pictures, but not yet :)

I went to scope out a new portrait location...a place nearby that I will be shooting at on Friday morning. It is an outdoor mall with some cool architecture, sculptures and little niches that seem perfect for photographs. I love trying new locations, and this one was no exception. It was pretty chilly, so we didn't stay long, but I took a few of my favorite models along for a practice shoot. We were there during the worst (brightest) time of the day, but still got some great shots, even though the light in the shadows was too flat for my taste. See what you think!

I haven't fully edited them, but thought they give you the gist of what we did today :) I was so happy to have the boys in some shots...they rarely get involved, mostly because they rarely decide to comb their hair and put on something besides basketball shorts and a logo t-shirt! Today, they humored me (a little) by at least putting on some different clothes. Victory!!!!!! How do you get boys at this age to care? Ha. Like I should be talking...I still don't care every day (but I'm trying!! All part of my Proverbs 31 challenge...)

Love this one!! Josh was my spotter on this one to make sure she didn't fall off the wall we had her perched on (precariously)...

What did you celebrate today?
.

Miracles, Baking, and Client Fears...oh my!

2011-11-08T23:49:00.000-08:00

.
First, my apologies for the weird-looking symbols in my last post :/ Not sure what happened, but I intend to go back and fix it. Those spaces and symbols are driving me crazy!! lol

In case you hadn't noticed, I love food. I have always loved the creativity that cooking/baking allow, and LOVE cooking for my family! One thing I do whenever I have unresolved emotions is bake. When I am happy, I bake. When I am sad, I bake.

Recently, I have felt like celebrating! Nothing has changed in my circumstances, but God is doing a new thing in my heart. Seriously. I have been experiencing a revival from within that has been a long time coming.

This morning, I was reading in Acts again. Ever since I started my Proverbs 31 challenge, I have felt led to read in Acts. This has coincided with our family starting to attend a new church and what I will affectionately call the "Revival of 2011." :D

"For I am confident of this very thing,

that He who began a good work in you

will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus."

Philippians 1:6 (NAS)

Between reading about the Holy Spirit and seeing it at work in church every Sunday, God is moving me forward...He is continuing the work He has already begun in me. And that, my friends, causes a kind of joy that I have never experienced any other way. There is just something special and unique about the joy that comes from being in synch with our Creator! By "in synch," I simply mean in constant communication with...not that my steps are perfect like His. :)

Today's reading in Acts was fascinating. It has been so long since I read this book, and I was much younger the last time. As usual, I am getting something entirely different from it this time around. One thing I never realized was in Acts is sort of a timeline of all the major Biblical events. When Stephen addresses the Sanhedrin, he goes through everything from Abraham, then Isaac, then Jacob...to Joseph being sold into slavery, to the famine, to Moses's birth, then the burning bush, to Aaron, and finally to Solomon's temple! I couldn't stop reading...then came the miracle: God allowed Stephen to fall asleep while he was being stoned to death.

At this point, I had to keep reading...so I did. I read about Philip and the Ethiopian eunuch. The part that stuck with me there was that the Spirit of the Lord "suddenly took Philip away,"...and he appeared in a completely different city!!! Um, that's space/time travel...long before Star Trek or Star Wars were written. Another miracle.

As I reached Chapter 9, I glanced at the heading - "Saul's Conversion." This, I remember well, and love. The miracle here is not just that he was blinded and then what looked like scales fell from his eyes when the Holy Spirit filled him, but that he was one of the biggest persecutors of the Christians and yet, God saw him worthy of redemption. God saw his potential and that he could be used to bring the Gentiles into a relationship with Him. God loved him and saw within him what no one could see from the outside. God saw him the way He created him, not the way he had become. This is how God sees us! God sees us from the inside out. He knows not just the current state of our heart, but the potential as well.

I read all the way to the end of Chapter 9, which is where Peter sends everyone out of the room, because Tabitha (Dorcas) had died. When everyone left the room, he got down on his knees and prayed. Then he turned toward her dead body, and said, "Tabitha, get up." Then she opened her eyes and sat up! An incredible miracle.

Do you see why I love Acts? It may be slow reading because it contains a lot of information, but it is amazing to see all the miracles that the Holy Spirit allowed the apostles to perform.

After reading this morning, I looked through the ~~newspaper~~ weekly ads. One of them advertised a cosmetic product line called Miracle Worker. On the containers, there were several different "definitions" of miracle (worker). I was so intrigued, since I had just been reading about so many miracles! The one that stuck out to me most was this one: "miracles begin with a fresh perspective." Wow. Funny how God can even use an advertisement to speak to us.

I have been thinking about perspective a lot lately. Perspective in photography, perspective in life, perspective in church, about God, about Acts (lol), etc...no matter where we are in life, or what we are doing, our perspective darkly colors what we see and experience around us. That is why we have four Gospel accounts...four different men experiencing Jesus from different viewpoints, or perspectives.

We might need to change our mental view/outlook (our "perspective"). In photographing a client, I try to remember that one step to the right, one to the left, or even a complete turn can change the image I capture exponentially. Just a few degrees to the right/left can make a subject look completely different! In my walk with Jesus, do I need to take a slight step to the right? To the left? Do I need to turn around completely? Whatever it is I need to do, I am willing to change my perspective so that I can see the world around me the way He does. So that I can see the miracles He continues to work in my life and the lives of those around me. So that I don't get lost in life and miss the point entirely.

Whew! Ok...are we ready for something a little lighter yet? Good, because today was a baking day....AND....a photography day! So get ready to feast your eyes (lol) on some pictures. Remember, perspective can make all the difference.

These were mini chocolate cakes that I baked in the microwave! They were based on this recipe. We called them "celebration cakes." I made them yesterday, just because I felt like celebrating :) After everyone devoured theirs, they felt like celebrating too...lol I topped them with a chocolate fudge frosting (made with a little shortening, since R can't have coconut butter, but everything else, including the banana and stevia were from here) and mini fall leaf-shaped sprinkles.

Today, I still felt like celebrating, so it was mini-snickerdoodles. Again, adapted from this recipe.
I also made some more graham crackers, per my daughter's request. Since I had already mixed raw sugar and cinnamon for the outsides of the snickerdoodles, I just used the leftover mixture for the sugar in the grahams...to make cinnamon graham crackers. They were so good! I just can't make them as fast as everyone around here eats them.

Proof that children are more technologically advanced at a younger age every year. Here, she is talking on her [not-working] cell phone. Thought this was too cute a moment to not take a picture :)

The princess got tired of walking around our favorite red bullseye store, and as she was walking asked her "babies" if they were tired and wanted to go to sleep. She then put them into a miniature basket. I asked her if she wanted to get into the "bed," and she said yes. And here's how we ended up!

After giving the kids a chance to look around and decide what ONE gift they think they'd like for Christmas this year after ~~they~~ I ~~clean out~~ get rid of their current toy population, we headed to the park so I could take a few pictures in between bouts of rain today. I had a challenge planned for myself, and I was excited to see how it would work. My goal was to go to one location, spend less than 10 minutes, and take 15 frames or less. Out of those, I wanted to see at least 5 "keepers." Here are our stats (as recorded by my oldest):

Location: neighborhood park
Time spent: 8 minutes (give or take about 30 seconds)
Frames: 14
Keepers: at least 8 (I didn't post them all)

I think it is important that clients realize I don't need a lot of time to make the shoot work. I don't need perfect weather. I don't even need cooperative children (mine was overdue for a nap and didn't really want to be taking pictures)! All I need is about 10 minutes, and I can get a good sampling of useable portraits.

Here are some of our favorites:

She loves to give trees hugs and kisses these days. She even tells the tree in our front yard, "bye," and "I love you," or "see you later" when she goes back inside. She is a crazy, amazing little girl!

Loved this simple change in expression (perspective, anyone?)...

So excited to have found a place with some fall foliage :) In Texas, that isn't always easy!

This one is my favorite. I know there is a lot of background, but I think it would be beautiful on a canvas for that very reason.

So, while I am tackling client fears (i.e., bad weather, no time for a shoot, uncooperative kids), what are some of the reasons you put off booking a portrait session with a professional photographer? I'd love to know! I would love to tackle each fear/hesitation one at a time...this makes me a better photographer and helps me better understand my clients...it gives me a new perspective.
.

A Few of My Favorite Things [Foods]

2011-11-03T23:38:00.000-07:00

.
Asemi-wordless post, because it's late and I am still working through somethoughts for the next post :)

Allphotos taken with my camera phone, so please excuse the poor quality!

Spinach salad withChicken Sausage, freshly grated parmesan, chia seeds and a homemadehoney-balsamic dressing:

Grilled Pork, heated Flatout wraps, steamed apples, spinach saladwith tomatoes and avocado, and local BBQ sauce:

Pumpkin Cream Cheese Bars

Pumpkin Chocolate ChipBread Pudding w/frozen whipped topping…a huge hit at my house, and even betterthe next day, straight out of the refrigerator.

Want the recipe? Ok :) I shared it on my FB page, so why not post it here...I'm all about passing on the goodness!

‎2 c almond flour
1 tsp baking soda
1 1/4 tsp cinnamon (I don't think you can ever have too much!)
3/4 tsp baking powder
3/4 tsp salt
1/3 c nondairy milk (I used light plain soy; almond would be great too! Tip: if you use sweetened milk, omit T of agave)
1 and 1/2 tsp pure vanilla extract (I use this amount of double strength vanilla)
1/2 cup + 1T agave syrup
1 and 1/2 T lemon juice
2 c tightly-packed, mashed banana (measured after mashing; I used frozen, heated in microwave then mashed, so they were more watery than fresh...this helps the batter bake into bread pudding, and not just a loaf of bread)
1/2 cup chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350 F. Combine dry ingredients, and mix well. Make a well in dry ingredients. In a separate bowl, combine wet ingredients. Pour all at once into well in dry ingredients. (Mix by hand, and don’t overmix.) Pour into a large greased loaf pan (fill about 3/4 full or it will drip over sides while baking...you can probably use two small pans instead of one large, but may need to adjust cooking times) and cook for around 1 hour.

Tip: check it every 10 minutes starting around 50 minutes. Cook until the consistency you like. I baked around 70 minutes at 350 then about 10 mins at 375. That gave me a nice brown crispy top and slightly gooey center. We topped it with frozen cool whip, and it is a sugary (not really) treat...a little goes a long way. :) Whole family loved it!

One of my favorite mugsfilled with Vanilla Almond Tea and soy milk foam...

Had to show the back ofthe mug :)

Homemade graham crackers!! These were delicious, and the kids made them from start tofinish. We put the traditional holes in our crackers before baking, and thekids had fun making letters and shapes :)

Mmmmmmmm....

I don't even likemarshmallows, but I love s'mores :) Look at all that gooey-ness...with aGhirardelli bittersweet chocolate disc on the bottom. We all ate these until wefelt sick, but because we had made our own grahams using white whole wheatflour, agave, and only 2T raw sugar, we didn't feel as guilty :)

Fordinner, we had one of our all-time favorite soups: Guy Fieri's Chicken Pozole.We change it up every time, based on what meat we have thawed or more readilyavailable at the time. Tonight, we used four boneless pork chops (thin) and twoboneless, skinless chicken breasts. It was a meaty soup! Because of myhusband's love for hominy, we might have gotten a little carried away with thisbatch :) It was a thick soup (usually we make it with more broth), and lots ofwhole hominy...but it was still wonderful!

The toppings...don't theylook beautiful? I love fresh veggies...

Jerry's bowl...he workedhard to make it look nice, and then took this picture :) He was very proud ofhow it turned out, and wanted me to use it here. I think he did a great job!!

Halloween

2011-10-31T22:48:00.000-07:00

.
The crew...an angel in disguise, a spy kid, and a fairy princess! As usual, Josh was the most excited about his costume out of all the kids. He really gets into it, and always puts a lot of thought into his costume. I will have to take pictures later of all the accessories that made his outfit. He had a spy watch and a belt loaded with things like a cool-looking flashlight, a wallet, complete with Jr. FBI agent badge, sunglasses, and an attache case that looks like it is right out of a spy movie! He and I went on a date to Go*dwill while R watched the other kids. He and I can go a little crazy sometimes, but we love to piece his costumes together one item at a time until we are happy with the final product. He thinks this is his best costume yet :)

Jerry wanted to be an angel, but he didn't want the white gown, etc. He wanted to be an angel in disguise :) Good thing, because his wings took me all day to make!

The little ones...the fairy princess and her buddy:

Let the trick or treating begin!

My sweet boy :)

The spy!

She got the hang of it immediately!

I love this picture! It's not the best quality, but I love the colors in the sky, and I love the way Josh is making sure the princess is safe crossing the street :)

Fall Festival

2011-10-30T22:00:00.000-07:00

"It is good to praise the LORD and make music to your name,
O Most High, to proclaim your love in the morning
and your faithfulness at night"

Psalm 92:1-2

Today was the kind of day I usually hope for. The kind where I felt like I lived in a small town...but in a good way :) Church this morning was great! It was our second time to visit what we hope will be our home church. All the kids loved their classes, and the little one said, "had fun church!" This is a big step, since she has screamed when we dropped her off in every other church childcare room. The boys said, "did you make a new friend, today?" The princess said, "Jesus," and then proceeded to sing, "Jesus Loves Me" on a continuous loop until we stopped for lunch! Love that sweet girl!

Lunch was nice...we had great company, and it was just nice to have someone to eat with in our new city!

Later, we walked to the local park to meet up with some other families in the neighborhood for a fun time of soccer! This is our second week to go, and the kids really look forward to it all week. Some pics from last week:

A walk by the lake with Daddy:

Hannah's sweet little friend :)

Question mark. I would think an exclamation point would be more appropriate, but maybe that's just me! Instead, the snake left us wondering...what type am I? Where do I live? How long ago did I shed my skin? Eek!

Jerry, playing soccer for the first time since he was in pre-k :)

The group...playing hard! I don't think Josh stopped moving the entire game!

The post-goal high-five! Love it! Sweet boy worked so hard all game; he hasn't played soccer since he was 3? 4? He used to hate the amount of running involved, but now he loves it! What a difference his school's running club made for him last year!

While the boys played their game, I walked/ran for about an hour. It felt wonderful! The weather was gorgeous, and the princess cooperated with me by sitting in her stroller for that entire time. Hooray! She's having a red letter day :) I walked on a few trails and saw some activity at the Baptist Church that owns this particular park. So, I made my way over and found out there was going to be a fall festival this evening! The kids wanted to go, so we just walked from soccer over to the church. R was able to meet us, which was awesome! The boys went out in a canoe, they went through a Camp Gl*diator (Kids) course (so cool!), and got their faces painted. We didn't stand in line for archery or the little train, but that was okay, because we went and did the cake walk as we were leaving...and three of us won!

As we were walking home from the festival/soccer/park, I realized that this is the reason I have always wanted to live in a small town...because I really love to walk everywhere! I love that we walked from our house to go play soccer with other neighborhood kids. I love that we walked to the fall festival!! I love that we live in a neighborhood that offers all of those things in such close proximity! I am so thankful that God enabled us to live here. He truly brought us to this house, and I am so thankful for the opportunity. The house may have its challenges, but we couldn't be in a better area for the kids and our family.

Enough talk - here are some of the pictures! Because I wasn't planning on the fall festival, I left my camera at home...so cell phone pics are all I have. Some of them aren't too bad, thank goodness :)

First things first...a canoe ride! All the events were "timed" and the kids had score cards where they documented their times. At the end, you turned it in and tried to win the fastest times in your grade. Very cool concept for a fall festival, and the boys really liked it!

Ok, so the sweet youth group girls weren't the best with a paint brush :) This is an elephant, in case you were left wondering...

A cross...

Then, it was time for the Camp Gl*diator course. So much fun! I might try to sign the boys up for the next camp, because it is like one big strength training exercise...but fun :)

Jerry's in the lead!

Here comes Josh!

Today was a good day! So very thankful for my husband and my children. Without them, my life wouldn't be nearly as much fun.
.